Little Miracles of Life

From one topic to another

2012-01-17T22:06:00.001+08:00

Now before you get the wrong idea, NO, I'm not getting married anytime soon :D

It's just that the topic between the housemates and I during lunch was on marriage, wedding dowry, babies, yada yada yada you get it right?

So yeah. Apparently my housemates have already "decided" that one wants a football team (worth of kids), another wants his own basketball team. :P

*gulps* Nah . . . I'm not that ambitious. If you really have to know, I'll aim for 2, maximum 3. Book club! (Lame, I know). But in all honesty, a child is a whole world of joy ~~pain~~ and responsibility. And I wanna make sure that I can cope, you know!

Just a random thought. And while this post serves totally no purpose, I'm just thinking of my parents, missing them, and wondering how they are. And feeling grateful that they are awesome parents, people I really, really love.

Thank you Dad, Thank you Mom. I love the both of you very, very much.

Love

2012-01-17T21:47:00.000+08:00

One of my favourite quotes in the Bible is "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick" (Matthew 9:!2), said by none other than Jesus Himself. Nowadays, 1 in 3 people get cancer. Everyone has some sort of health problems. The hospital is always packed.

But have we ever thought about our mental, spiritual health? Who are we? Why do we exist? Does anyone love us? What if, someone loved you so much, that he gave up his only son's life for you? If you dare, watch the video. Be prepared to have an open heart though. And search your heart in all honesty.

For me, it challenges who I think I am, my self esteem, my all . . . I know I fail, all the time! But because of You, I am perfect. I am spotless. I am blameless. I am loved. I am Yours. And that I think, is enough for me to live this life, and through eternity.

Birthday Celebration part 3 aka Hi Tea @ Flavors, Swiss Garden & Residences

2012-01-07T20:02:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday to all January babies!

(my mum always says if she knew I wanted to "come out so early" (3rd Jan), she would have tried to ask me come out earlier/at the end of the year...lol!)

Anyway, my other half and I went to Swiss Garden Flavor's Restaurant to celebrate :D We bought the hi tea coupon from everyday at 50% off, which of course was a steal :)

Pictures I managed to capture for the day :)

Flavor's Interior.

The interior upon arrival. Lighting was nice, deco was classy, awesome ambiance. Bustling with people.

The Appetizer corner

The choices were abundant, with fresh leaves, salads etc. there was even a cheese counter with a few variants of cheese for our hi-tea! :)

The dedicated waffle corner :)

Rushed at it since I'm a sucker for waffles + honey :D :D :D

Appetizers and Waffles! :D

Started by taking appetizers and waffles with honey, my all time favourite. Appetizer section is well stocked. the beef salad was gooooood X)

Fresh oysters :D

Having gone for a few hi-tea buffets now, I can say this is one of the better ones. (see the osyters!? :) )there were fresh oysters and prawns. I was there for close to 2 hrs and they had refilled at least twice (although people took it just as fast!)

Dessert corner

The dessert corner was honestly the most well stocked of the place, with generous varieties of puddings, cakes, fruits etc. Most were good, one should save space for some delightful desert and the end.

Colourful palate of desserts! :D

My plate of desserts, shared with my awesome partner :) tried mixed berries, christmas cake, puddings, custard creams etc :)

Main course

Notice that I din't talk much bout main course? There were 3 counters like the above 1, serving Malay dishes, Western dishes and Chinese dishes each. Food was fair (well it is a high tea not "lunch" per say), the roast beef was AWESOME. I think the specialty here is beef la :D

Dimsum and Noodles

Dimsum and noodles station was also another station featured outside the restaurant, with tomyum and soup noodles, and various paos and dimsums serving outside, constantly manned by 2 chefs.

Soup

Can't run away from soup apparently :p I tried main courses including their soup and dishes, which I find pretty mediocre. Decent but nothing special. Again, apart from the roast beef :D

Thumbs up

His verdict: good.

Just don't overeat at buffets - suffer only later when too full.

Happy birthday Mr Handsome Boy :)

May you have an awesome year ahead :) :)

Posing outside Flavor's restaurant. We enjoyed ourselves, staff were courteous, service was good (eg water was constantly refilled).

All in all enjoyed ourselves, stuffing ourselves, taking seconds (coz variety limited), chatting, taking photos :) A great day with great company :) Now, no more in denial . . . Older ady lah :/

My verdict: 4/5

Comment: Ambiance was good, food quality was fresh and above average, service was prompt and friendly, beef was da bomb. Kinda could do with a wider variety of main dishes though. :) Worth coming, would definitely consider if an offer comes up again :)

happy 2012

2012-01-01T23:46:00.001+08:00

Happy New Year 2012!

And may this year bring greater things, positive and good! :)

Rant

2011-12-22T09:09:00.001+08:00

Show encrypted text

random

2011-12-19T12:18:00.000+08:00

hi bloggie,this has been a long weekend.went all over,felt both joy n pain.,y heartfelt message-people Need God.

Hutan Lipur (near Kuala Pilah) spontaneous trip

2011-12-10T01:35:00.000+08:00

The keyword here is spontaneous. Haha.

So for psychiatry we have 2 trips to Kuala Pilah, both on Wednesdays. So after lunch the second week, Becky decided to head into the woods (literally) for a spontaneous trip to the Hutan Lipur (which I have no idea is what name)

I shall blog with the few scarce pictures I took :P

Jakuns :P

Proof of the jungle environment, with the curvy turvy trees branches etc.

Oh of course, and my awesome buddies :D

Outside the snake's glass "cage"
There was also a Taman Ular Sawah (Snake farm), with quite many huge snakes on display.

Beautiful Rebecca "Rendaming kaki"
Since we were there, we decided to go dip our legs in the pool which we saw,
where others did the same earlier. Expected the water to be hot,
but it was surprisingly an icy cold :P

Yours truly "getting close to mother nature"

with the two big men towering behind spoiling my pic:P

Since they wear shoes n socks, they decided it'll be too tiresome

for them to take our their shoes, wear them back again...

Not so clear and icy cold water :D

One for memories' sake
Someone looking smart in his formal shirt n tie . . . :)
The one who never fails to encourage me to WALK and excercise . . . :P

This was a random 1/2 hour + trip which saw us walking into the jungle in the middle of the day (1pm+), seeing snakes and dipping our feet into nice cold flowing water :) Entry was free, just like your average park. I vote that we should have more trips before we get old and our bones start to ache and creak ( wait, I think they already do at times . . . :/ )

when 5/6 people in the bungalow hear it...

2011-12-06T17:09:00.001+08:00

The funny moment when you're talking to someone whose's inside the toilet about next semester's groupings, and the one downstairs hears and responds all the way upstairs as well, telling her to change to his group instead . . . And the one in the next room hears it and all of us simply burst out laughing . . .

simply coz this place is definitely not soundproof.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. can't help it but to laugh . . .

Service with a Smile . . . Not

2011-12-05T15:00:00.000+08:00

So I sent my poor lappy to the Asus Service Centre @ SPS building, Jalan Imbi this morning, after years of it having a broken hinge and a cracked LCD cover. There goes RM250 . . .

The thing that I found out today was a little surprising to me. (NO Offence meant to ANYONE at all, this is my blog and my observation). The guy attending to me was a foreigner, Caucasian, probably German. Anyway, he WASN'T FRIENDLY AT ALL. You know how the saying goes "service with a smile"? This was the totally OPPOSITE.

Told my dad bout what I noticed, and he told me that actually, this is one of the classic "real westerners", whom mostly are cold and not friendly, especially to us Asians. In fact, I recall that he and my mum told me last time when they invited people over for lunch, "2.30pm" meant 2.30pm, and if you came say, an hour, even 15 mins earlier, they'll make you wait outside the door.

I guess whatever grouses I have with our country, the one thing I love about this place is the people. I'm always impressed when different races interact with politeness, like recently how the Malay ladies from the roadside hawker stall said "terima kasih" (thank you) with such sincerity after I bought a burger that it makes my day.

So yeah, this guy who attended to me was pure businesslike, minus the courtesy and smile. Sigh . . . I could go on ranting but whatever, this isn't want I really want.

Today, I see one of the sides of Asians that are rare in the "developed world". I see the warmth, the genuine care that we have for one another, like when I saw an old Indian lady help a paraplegic Chinese man place a pillow at his side in the hospital, treating him as one of her own.

This is what we're supposed to be. The world will know you when you love your neighbour. How true.

Tummy Upset :(

2011-12-04T22:35:00.001+08:00

Had severe burning + colicky pain for the past two days now, which was seriously a torture. Started yesterday, an hour after having horlicks and roti pisang at a mamak restaurant.Finally am better now after taking lots of oral rehydration salts to normalise the electrolytes in my body, H2 Receptor blockers Ranitidine and Proton Pump Inhibitor for the gastritis (burning pain)...but the colicky pain persisted.

To top it off, I had severe nausea, which dad gave me Stemetil for. Its ironic, coz Stemetil can cause further pain. So how?

Dad finally went to the hospital to get anti spasmodics Buscopan for me, and he took activated charcoal pills as well. So now I'm better, but the pain is still there when I move (say, getting up from the bed, or the chair..)

Hope I get well soon. Gastrointestinal upsets have, and always are one of my biggest nightmares :(

Fun Fair @ Port Dickson

2011-12-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

It's been past a year and I've never been to Ben, a friend's house in Port Dickson. Came home after uni, went shopping for dinner materials, went home to be told to put everything back into the fridge. lol!

So to PD we went, the friend staying near the hospital. Well his place is awesome, and apart from the space factor( I need more space). I love the furnishing of the house, the view of his balcony(facing the beach n sea...who doesn't wanna wake up to such a beautiful view every morning??) the way everything is set. But no pictures since its his privacy we're talking about.

We went out for dinner (again no pics) and I took a "burger oblong" from the roadside. IF I ever go again I shall snap a photo. Well it was decent, and a friend described it as "just like prosperity burger from MacD but a fraction of the price". Guess I gotta agree there.

Then since opposite the road there was this fun fair, we made a trip there. Din't take many photos since left hp in the car..but here r some of the scenes that we managed to capture.

Ferris wheel, 360 turning thingy....

The rides at the fair. Pretty decent for a small time fair.

Legalized gambling :P

Some of the stalls there. There were the "mesti dapat" games and the "tak mesti dapat" games. There were actually many people there...

Among the many stalls...

The awesomes who went :D

The 5 of us who went, Ben even in his formal attire -.-

You spin my head right round right round...

The highlight of the day - the ride of the pirateship like ride which turned 360 degrees which lasted for 3 mins+. came of feeling slightly nauseated, CS with headache... but apparently it was worth it :P

The reason I went on? coz got frenz teman, and coz I wanted to try it out. You know as you grow older u sorta lose the ability to do that, get nauseated faster? well I wanted to tick this of my "life's to do list" (which I don't have :P ) before I hit middle age. Aha.

My souvenir for the day, a pillow with a cacat smiley face :D

Guess its time to introduce my other half (in case you haven't deduced from the past few posts and my sidebar)... my Mr Tall, the one who always makes me laugh, the one whom always makes me smile :) My other half, Samuel :) He tossed some tokens and got me a pillow :D

It was pretty fun, going back and sleeping till morning 10+ coz there wasn't class the day after. And going back and cooking tomyam soup for lunch.

Thank you God for all the blessings that you have placed in my life. I appreciate it all. :)

Breakfast @ Cempaka Service Suites

2011-11-27T09:54:00.001+08:00

My pageviews everyday average around 3 or less. Heh, This sorta means I have privacy, means that I can post (just about) everything I want.

Blogging to me is a rare luxury of sorts, tho I have tons of pictures to upload. I should however watermark my pictures :) The last sets of pics were so light it was barely visible...

anyway, stayed over @ Cempaka hotel /suite and had buffet breakfast today.

Some breakfast pics :D

Double Sunny Side Up!!

I love sunny side ups! I always thought sunny side up was d bomb..until I got a surprise when I got double egg! :D Double sunny day! Eheh. The chef is awesome I think. But as a consequence, so busy taking photo that my egg was cold the time I ate it...:/ But still nice nontheless :D

NO APPLES

Ahahaha. A you can see there are fruits, But no apples. You know they always say that "an apple a day keeps the doctor away"? since I'm gonna be a doctor, I can't keep myself away right! (Lol) Anyway there wasn't any apple :P (lameness aside :P )

Of coz ate slightly more than that, burnt 2 pieces of bread in the process (think their toaster was spoilt). just for fun:

Proof in "black and white"

It was smoking hot but naturally, Not edible...

They have pretty simple but nice Christmas deco that they started doing yesterday. I'll see if I can snap a picture of it. As usual, pretty photographs courtesy of my shutterbug youngest bro... :)

The Adventures of Tintin @ MBO Terminal 2

2011-11-26T13:30:00.000+08:00

So (most of) us the housemates had finished our family medicine end of posting exams on Tuesday. Suddenly I heard that we were going out for Thai food with another batchmate June, my neighbour Roshnee and the 7th housemate (since he's here so often) Benedict and I went O.o (coz I already had food), but I went along as well. Thai food was reasonable, no pictures.

Then later Ben decided that he wanted to watch Tintin, and settled on MBO Cinema @ Terminal 2 coz it started 1/2 an hour earlier than Jusco Sban cinemas.

Posing with the poster of the movie.

Someone said like little kids, but ah well, sometimes you gotta let lose a lil, no?

I gotta a minor, wait, MAJOR rant though. Among the many cinemas I've been to, I find the cinema @ MBO seremban the most ridiculous of all. They charge for toilet usage, 20cents/entry. Ok, a guy's gotta go when a guy's gotta go. You would expect it to be at the very least well maintained, no?

The toilet stank, the place was dirty, and there were NO toilet rolls or paper in sight! Such horrible "service". I vote for GSC or TGV 's toilet anytime, its well maintained, clean and pleasant even! And no stink...

The only picture with all 8 of us in sight

Albeit CS's face is a little hidden. Fun fact, All 8 of us squeezed into Ben's CRV. Crazy times, where everyone smells each other's smell or odour of smelly shirts. . . :O

Ben's awesome photo taking skills

Sacarsm of course, when 1 person's face is cut off. Somehow even with the I phone I find the pictures grainy and not of the best quality. Then again, memories are what matters most.

Anyway! My review of The adventures of Tintin: 6/10.
Graphics were above average, as they managed to make it somewhat old school. Story was...predictable, although some fighting scenes were interesting and kept one with bated breath. Kinda found the main character, Tintin kinda annoying. . . Would I want to watch it again? Probably not, once more than suffices.

Vietnamese Food @ O Viet, Pyramid

2011-11-25T11:46:00.000+08:00

So just in case you din't know, I'm quite into buy deals online lately. For a year or so already, actually :P

Anyway, Groupon came up with this deal, RM50 for 4 portions of Vietnamese noodles/vermicelli and an Imperial roll. The original price was nearly twice at RM99.55. I went on the 16/11, a rainy Wednesday evening.

(Having not blogged for some time, I feel that I'm kinda cacat at words now :/ )
So I'll let some pictures do the talking =)

So yes, the exterior.

O Viet @ Sunway Pyramid

I think it recently went through a facelift or something. Environment is warm and cozy.

The interior, Chinese lanterns and ambience.

The "other side" we were sitting, separated by metal fence like thingy. People started filling up the place at 8pm onwards. . .

Dainty decorations on the wall

As the deal din't come with drinks, my bro and dad ordered fruit juices, while I settled on refillable jasmine plus strawberry tea.

Pineapple juice, supposedly without ice or sugar.

Rating: 3.8/5, Price around RM7 or 8.
Pretty standard, I suspect they still did add a tad bit of sugar.

Jasmine and strawberry tea

Rating: 3/5, Price: RM6.90
My dad found it weird, while I find it mediocre. Strange tasting, not bitter but nothing exotic as well.

The food:

Mixed Roll Delite

Rating: 3/5, Original price RM18.90
A high class (read: more expensive) version of your street popiah. Ingredients were ok, but doesn't give you the refreshing taste your hawker side noodle gives you.

Vietnamese Beef Noodles

Rating: 3/5, Original price RM15.90
The special guest had this since we were taking the dry stuff. He said it was ok. . .Although I have to admit that I had tasted a better version at Pho Hoa @ Curve, Damansara Utama. This just din't impress me.

Grilled prawn with imperial roll noodles

Rating: 3.5/5, Original price RM17.90
Somewhat traditional Vietnamese Vermicelli with prawns and spring roll, which my bro and I took. Again, I feel that the Viet Vermicelli @ Pho Hoa is better. The sauce they provided there was refreshing, while there was no sauce here apart from sour chilli paste. Portion of ingredients were fair, and I have to credit them for giving us the usual portion as those who bought it at original price.

Apart from that, my dad had the traditional chicken and prawn noodle( no picture, originally RM15.90). Again not impressive, as my dad described it as "your normal kuey teow soup at the hawker stall".

Overall the experience was a normal one, nothing impressive. I'll probably not come back again since I can get the same stuff at a fraction of the price.

Overall ratings:
Food: 3/5, again, nothing to shout about. Wouldn't highly recommend it.
Ambiance: 4/5 - The ambience was pretty high class, no dirty cushions etc
Service: 4/5, no complains, though a tad slow at times
Price: 3/5 (Based on the deal price), Din't feel like the food was amazing.

Overall rating: 6/10.

My first food review in this bloggie (I think) :)

Emo

2011-11-23T17:21:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, many times even, I do things I don't realise. You know, like habit. Like when you're that comfortable when it becomes somewhat second nature...

Sometimes I hate myself for that reason. I dislike getting into trouble, even a minor comment bordering on the hint of a telling-off...esp not when I get another into the muddle.

Hate hate hate. Emo emo emo.

Bah, I know this is a small thing, But everyone has stuff that will eat at that person. For me, I guess this is one of it.

Happy

2011-11-17T20:22:00.001+08:00

Despite having a huge ulcer on the right side near my wisdom tooth, despite the fact that it hurts to eat and talk, I feel happy.

For the past few days, I've felt happy. Maybe the better word is joy. Its a stage of acceptance I think, when one accepts that what one wants may not be the best for himself, and instead, God has better plans.

Last year, I still wasn't happy. Sure,I'm not happy everyday. Life has its ups and downs, and frankly, sucks sometimes.

But today at least, I will let myself feel the joy that is running through my veins, A joy that flows from appreciating what I have, from my awesome family and friends to what and all He has placed in my life.

A few pics from the "hols" in September/ October :D Of beloved people :)

@Lil pantry with Sooky :)

Boy, havn't I seen her in a long, long time... I remember we used to be twins *good memories*. Girl I miss u. Ps: you're beautiful. (I mean it!)

Meet up with Rachel@ Wang river

Kinda hard to imagine we date back "so long" now...Since high school! Gurl was good meeting up with you. Love to see the strong, confident woman you are right now. Go rock the architecture world! :)

SPONGEBOB!!!

No, I din't go to Bikini Bottoms. :P Neither is it Jellyfish Fields.

This was actually @ Shah Alam I City, outside the Snow walk which we din't go in :)

@Genting theme park with Mr. Tallman :D

Being too old to go into the park(self declared), we just walked all around the hotels, walkways, indoor themepark areas etc, enjoying the cool air. Oh, and stuffing ourselves at the best buffet lunch available there @ coffee terrace. hee *gains weight like nobody's business....nooooooo! *

For this and much more, I thank God for all I have. Even if all the riches in the world doesn't belong to me, I give thanks, for all I have now is enough for me.

"Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes from appreciating what we have, instead of being miserable about what we don't have. It's so simple?yet so hard for the human mind to comprehend."
Bits and Pieces

NEW TEMPLATE!!!

2011-11-15T22:55:00.001+08:00

As you can see, I'm pretty excited. Doubt anyone reads my blog now, but hey if you're there, gimme a shoutout! :D would love to know who is still here :D

Anyway a couple of stuff:
1.Template is new! Had oodles of fun choosing different backgrounds, colours etc. Hee. Just like a little girl :/ Do gimme some constructive criticism tho. Picture on top self taken, no copyrights issues. :) I may be really colour blind sometimes, so please tell me which 1's don't fit and which colour etc is better! :D

2. Links. I din't realise my links (cause I had a couple of tabs) were cancelled. for good? noooo. :'( So if you're there, PLEASE gimme a heads up with your link, either in the chatbox or leave a comment. Will link you back, if you're my friend! Promise! :D

Here's to new beginnings! *Throws confetti to self since no one is here*. (ahh. so depressing thought :( )

Picture Stories October

2011-10-24T23:39:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, just when you thought you were over something; just when you talk about it, reminiscing...

You realize that the hurt is still there, the world is still cruel and unforgiving...

They say time is the best healer

And you resolve that the silent but steady stream of salt water flowing seemingly endlessly is necessary to build up who you are; and that the heartache, that seems like it could engulf one with the intense,wordless pain will contribute towards a stronger, better you...

The Promise -
that there will always be a rainbow after the rain

You let the tears flow, not caring to let it cease. And you look to above, remembering the promise. That through all the pain, tears, and joy, He is always there, and He cares.

My daily mornings

2011-10-03T20:56:00.002+08:00

You know how people can sleep through multiple alarms when its time to go to school/work?
Well I gotta admit, this is so much like me :D

Epic :D

Ahh...the bliss of being a student and the torture of getting up early in the mornings...

The people who created this clip are absolutely brilliant :)

September

2011-09-26T14:04:00.001+08:00

Wedding seems to be the theme of September. No surprise naturally, since its the "eighth month" in the Lunar Calender, which is deemed to be an auspicious month for stuff like these.

So yes, a cousin decided to get married this month too. Pictures chosen below are courtesy of my brother who always carries his camera around:)

Pretty "door gift" with 2 cadbury sweets inside.

3rd generations.

A pic of the cousins who attended with my grandma. the (mostly) older cousins who din't attend are everywhere. studying, working..

(Notice that most of them are male?)

(Near) complete family photo

After the tea ceremony. Pic of the bride and groom, and the youngest to the oldest of relatives from my paternal side who gathered for this age-old ceremony..

My pretty cousin sis and me.

We were joking that while the unmarried "kids" went up to receive "ang pows", we were included albeit sheepishly and half-embarassed...

(big kids mar)

My grandma :)

I always remember fond memories of my childhood while thinking of her, including going out with grandpa at that time to eat "wan tan noodles", her making glue out of starch for me during primary school and more...

It was a good time where the relatives (and cousins) got to mingle and ~~eat and eat~~ talk. haha. I guess the inevitable question for me (well you gotta expect it, knowing you're in that culture and age) was asked TWICE(at least) by 2 different aunts:

"When's your turn???"

-________-" to which I'll reply long, long time more, no where near in sight....

August

2011-08-27T02:49:00.000+08:00

Things I've acheived this holidays:

(Mostly) playing games
cleared up the bags on the floor (wait theres one more)
I dunno, play more games? Alice greenfingers, youda farmer, texas poker...
o ya, learn how to play poker and chor dai dee

*********************************************************************
On another note, my bro is back from India. happy to see him of course. Secretly thinking that he as a 1st year (first semester!) manipal med student is much better (at least theoretically) than me! I know I can't compare with his knowledge in anatomy, physiology, biochemistry, embryology... (wait that's everything..)

Such a depressing feeling I tell you.

*********************************************************************
But on a happy note, I've passed my year 4(halfway through actually) exams! so I've got 1.5 years more to go officially. All glory to Him, not by my might but by His grace. And of course my dad, who drilled me like crazy. And the support of all my friends and family and loved ones (you know who you are). thank you for listening to me rant all the time /emo / fret (thanks Sam) and being there for me; for guiding me (and talking also la :P ) through osce practice sessions (Thanks Sook Cheng and ever faithful Shane) and everyone whom I missed out (like those I jz random msged (fifi etc). And special thanks to the wonderful seniors like Christy and Priscilla and Szu May that really helped us in the last week (read: few days before exam) for OSCE. I think I learnt most of my osce in the last week..lol.

***********************************************************************

I think everyone has issues to sort out, stuff that are always at the back of ones mind. its just how one does it, how the end result will be. just pensive over some stuff. I guess I'll remember the serenity prayer -

Learning to trust the Hand who holds the plans and the future.

Close 2 exams

2011-07-27T14:12:00.000+08:00

Its close to exams (Again), and I's supposed to be studying. BUT, I'm distracted. just can't concentrate, can't tahan the fact that i chose not to go for the "Extra class" this morning which was 2.5hrs and was supposedly very helpful.arrgh. ah well. whats done can't be undone..im not in harry potter world.

A friend was telling me about a lecturer's outburst on the recent protesting in KL, and was "aiming her anger towards the non malays". at the same time, she said the young generation only knows how to complain, only knows how to yell "migrate"... "u don't wanna stay, you blah je" (basically, go away) "see which country wants to accept you". for me, the demonstatrators were just making a statement, standing up for what they believe in. People used to say that the young generation doesn't care. Now that they do, they do it loud and strong. For me, I feel that a lecturer (or anyone for that matter) should never outrightly judge and condemn others for their choices...its simply unprofessional to say the very least. especially someone in the education field. You can vent your anger, but not like that, no?

So yeah, stuff like that used to bother me. Now, I just tell others that "we bring it out through actions - the ballot box". thats our responsibility, thats what we can and should do.

I had a fb friend who wrote on her status ".. Who the hell changed the name Tanah Melayu to Malaysia? Things wouldn't have become so difficult to explain if the name of the country itself was never changed." if you ask me, this statement is downright ...I'm not gonna say it here lah. Enough to say that to many parts of the world, the other colours skin will always be "Pendatang" who is here to "Steal their stuff - land money position etc". And there were a couple of "likes" on the status.

I should study. Bye.

target1

2011-07-17T01:43:00.000+08:00

Father God,

rain down Your peace and just presence, breathe in me. Sustain me through each day Abba Father, help me take 1 thing at a time, 1 day at a time.

Target today:
5 case summaries,
1 chapter apleys
1 psychiatry topic

2011-07-17T01:08:00.000+08:00

- Emo Post Alert -

I'm not sure if I'm able to put all my heart feels into words anymore...but here goes. And its something that's so jumbled up in my mind. Many somethings.

I feel utterly stressed. EOS 7 in less than a month, 22 days or so. I don't know how to do 7 postings worth of revision in like, less than a month, including OSCE practice etc. I honestly don't. I don't know where to start. I always make "timetables" that I fall really short of - I can barely do even half of what I set out to do.

The "die la" mentality is always, always playing at the back of my mind. I know it's not good, but sometimes, I think its an asian thing. I try to comfort myself..but it doesn't seem to work.

I'm the ultimate time waster and I know it, and hate myself for it. The many times I told myself "I'll try again" to fail again and again.

Looking back at facebook pictures, there is some part deep inside me that is sorta stirred. u know the feeling of looking back at certain photos that bring back lots and lots of memories, sweet, and at the same time painful and occasionally, bitter..although there's no "what if's" in this case instead a sense of acceptance, the heart still can't bring itself to fully "Get over" the phase, and each time something just triggers that memory, the heart will be sent sprawling back once again...

I guess you never "move on" some things, you just chuck it at the back of your mind and put on a brave smile to face tomorrow, to face the world where work and productivity calls, where emotions are(or should be) left aside. and i know tomorrow this will just be part of history, just like yesterday, the days and years before it... leaving behind nothing but memories, bits and pieces of what once was...

I'm not someone who is multitalented, or even talented. it was really hard adapting each time to a new condition, new environment. adjusting one's identity from who 1 thinks 1 was to tailor to the situation, to make oneself be able to adjust, to fit in. who doesn't wish he/she could sing crazy good? who doesn't wish studying was "a piece of cake, just like snapping one's fingers"? i wish i could. but im neither that, nor am i an artist, a dancer etc. i'm just a part of the world that doesn't make a difference even if I werent here; basically, im disposable off. thats probably the harsh reality of life.

I'm not even trying to garner votes from my "self pity". its just the stone cold truth that when you fall down, many times most will just run past you.without any regard. for the rest of the time, 1's facade outside will "pull" 1 through...at least for a while.

Father God, I guess its not easy really struggling alone (or so I think), where I'm not sure whether I'll make it through the next study hurdle, I'm not sure if tomorrow I'll remember again the past, what once was, I know in this world, I am but nobody...perhaps just remind me Abba Father, that I'm beautifully and wonderfully made in Your image, and that You love me and died on the cross for me. remind me that You made me beautiful, You made me perfect in Your sight, remind me that Lord You were d 1 who pulled me through, You will pull me through again, again , and again. I don't live in this world to please others but You Lord.remind me that You did not put a spirit of fear in me but a spirit of good cheer, of courage and a sound mind.Amen.

and after the heavy rain, if there is refraction of light you'll see a beautiful rainbow...and if the heart is finally still perhaps one will see that grace shines through, enough for tomorrow...

the same power that conquers the grave lives in me.

i think psychiatry draws me nuts, +the piling stress from everything. But as again,I'll have to learn to trust...

July

2011-07-03T11:48:00.000+08:00

I can't believe its July!!! 1 month to the big EOS 7 :S *jiayou mode on, if there's such a thing*

and i officially have a "dent" in my previous "memories" - I've got no post at all for the month of June. Maybe I could (I know I can) post 1 backdated, but seriously no point.. but it goes to show that Life here has been bz bz bz...

will post more in august. pinky promises *stares around at this dusty place, where no shadows of any human presence are in sight*

*sighs*

Empathy

2011-05-23T16:03:00.000+08:00

Hello blog, you;ve been dormant for some time now, no thanks to me.

Anyway, I'm done with paeds, now in orthopaedics. I thought it would be utterly boring...but to be fair its not. there are days where lectures each take 2 hrs(which is horrible, my attention span is super short)..but they managed to get a few lecturers that truly inspire.

And you know what inspires? Its the fact that they go the extra mile, turning down locum to do voluntary work, out of the word "Empathy".

Which is what most doctors lack nowadays. And just looking back, if all the doctors, cut that , even half of the doctors nowadays can do that, can pay a lil more attention to the patient instead of discharging themselves - our standard of care would Definitely improve.

And most politicians dont care. Well, unless they use the government hosptitals, which they have no need to. Private all the way. Notice how the top people are Always(or almost always ) warded at private hospitals? the Beach hospitals(translate to the national language) and other big branches... and hospitals continue to be a place to just "Save" lives but not necessarily increasing level of care and most definitely(in most cases) disregarde the quality of life of the patients.

Apart from that...6 months ady :D haha.

and sem 7 is towards the 2nd part, which is scary/dangerous. means exam coming, must practice, study etc etc etc... God help me that one day I become a doctor that cares, 1 that tries to go the extra mile and one with knowledge, competence and confidence.

Snogurt

2011-04-25T14:37:00.000+08:00

Spent yesterday, or a good 1/2 hr or more, searching for this place called "Snogurt". we know its in SS15, and we toured the place for so long...finally when we decided to put of the visit, we found the place. (As usual, so ironic!)

Anyway, my short review of the place:

Its a pretty expensive place, where 100g is RM4.90. I L/1kg is RM49.90, which is like RM50! and they have small and large cups for self service.

Don't be fooled, the "small looking" big cup actually is A lot, ~500g. so u do the math - RM20 or more.

Anyway, there are many many flavours. Don't be caught up by the "all time favourite" etc signs. for me, the only 1 worth trying is the Original Snogurt flavour. and it has alot of water in it - not so ice-cream or frozen yoghurt like.

Some simple pictures later. But for now, is safe to say I won't be going back there is a long time...If I ever want to go back there at all.

Value: 2/5 (It's very expensive...and watery doesn't make it worth it)
Ambiance: 4/5
Taste: 3/5

You

2011-04-19T20:00:00.000+08:00

Why is it that sometimes I just feel like the suckiest person on earth, that I'm not worth loving, that all I cause is strife, and that I always try and see people "realistically" - or rather, try and doubt everybody's goodness? The "world", as taught to me, will never take care of me, always is never trustworthy...

Help me remember that You are God of my life, that You hold my life in Your hands, You are my strength, my justice, my vindicator, my provider, my everything. And on days where life just seems so moody and sucky...well help me remember why I live. For You.

Of little children and exams

2011-04-18T13:38:00.003+08:00

Of little children and exams

Exams soon, havn't studied. Little children are adorable...until they cry. Luckily the toy a friend gave me seems to come in really really handy. :)

This week, help me to look to You and be more like You :)

A month later...

2011-04-17T05:49:00.000+08:00

Of a long month of hiatus.

Thats what Obstetrics did to me.

Now,I'm 3 weeks to exam,and know nothing. noooooooo....

I realise that people sometimes chase too hard to search for a meaning to life. By shopping, community work etc...

Remind me that I live for You.

2011-03-09T06:15:00.000+08:00

Seriously tiring, the business of mothers and children.

Don't take your mothers for granted ok, they really sacrifice the world for you.

Looking forward to a day I can do everything I want to -study, cook, sleep properly, wake up not so early.

hmmmm

2011-03-05T22:46:00.003+08:00

Isn't focused, and she noes it. She needs to stop playing the fool, and start.

Which means doing the right stuff. Like taking care of herself, her health, reading more, playing less.

Babies?

2011-03-04T12:26:00.000+08:00

One week at obstetrics. The one week solely in the labour room.

My conclusion on labour / bearing down? It may be a beautiful process after, but it certainly is PAINFUL to the utmost. If can, no one would wanna go through the pain.

The "bundle of joy" definitely comes with a heavy price, a heavy sacrifice. 9 months (i even ter-type weeks!) "parasite"-ing in the mother's womb, hours (sometimes days) of trying to push when one is exhausted...

But if you get the "end product" - alive, crying and kicking ~~although quiet ones are cuter!~~; sometimes coo-ing at you and looking wide eyed at the world...

The childlike innocence.

And the family's joy.

Perhaps it makes everything worth it.

Epic "Music"

2011-02-28T13:41:00.001+08:00

1st day of O & G

"Examination of the pregnant mother".

Guess what the accompanying music was?

The Lullaby.

Epicness.
~~Guess thats why you can't blame anyone for falling asleep~~

Sem 7

2011-02-25T23:57:00.000+08:00

And so, Sem 7 beckons this monday. Starting the posting ob-gy aka obstetrics and gynecology.

And not too sure if its something I really look forward to.

Semester 7

2011-02-15T21:59:00.000+08:00

And Surgery spelled the last of the 3 postings of semester 6. Followed by a big bang exam (well not so big lah, considering pass or not you still move on...). Which means...

Yes what you're seeing in sutures, part of what we did in surgery :D

I'm now in SEM7 aka YEAR 4!!!!~ :D :D :D

19 th Jan 11

2011-01-19T22:22:00.000+08:00

Today was a good day.

SOPD (Surgical Outpatient Department) we had about 8 cases or so, and all were pretty interesting. It was a wide variety of stuff where you finally go "ooh, yeah I know bout this!" in a day. And I was happily flipping through past Ultrasound scans of normal and pathological images of kidneys, bladders, prostate... falalalala

Then had MacD for lunch - I probably wouldn't go back there in a long time...everything has shrunken in size. not worth the money d lah >:( ...then went and got SHOES!!! :D something that I like, and at a cheap aka reasonable price I would pay for. Makes the pair of shoes I bought last Sat (a few days ago) look ex(pensive) lah. But cant un-buy the first...so whatever lah! :D

Then had suturing class. Loved it - it rocks! Suturing on chicken skin with surgical stuff...haha love the feel :D

Went for badminton but was pretty much tired out at the end of the day. Ah well, a day well spent :)

Till next time

Of Good Friends who Defies the Law of Distance

2011-01-18T20:44:00.000+08:00

Of Good Friends who Defies the Law of Distance

Beautiful girls in my life =)

Managed to take a pic :) Just because you're not here doesn't mean you're less awesome ok.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder...but in my limited experience, sometimes the fire just dies out too. You know, LDR's...your "I'll never forget u my high school bff!!!" stuff...

Met up with many juniors and friends at IMU last friday. met them in bout less than 3 hours, with the few only few 10s of minutes...but it was really awesome to see their faces, to hear their voices and to talk to them face to face...certainly there were some changes( like the original plan of jamming tak jadi)...but it was a great time of catching up and just "rekindling" the fire of friendship with these awesome awesome people. These are my beautiful friends, who make an enormous impact in my life. :)

Memories

2011-01-04T23:00:00.001+08:00

New Year Eve 10/11 countdown @ look out point

Of Memories, and much much more. Things are always changing, they're never the same.

Time moving so fast sucks :(

There goes my new year resolution.

Of birthday cakes, lame jokes, celebrations and most of all...good friends.

2011-01-03T22:41:00.001+08:00

Of birthday cakes, lame jokes, celebrations and most of all...good friends.

How can I but be amazed and blessed by His grace. I'm officially 1 year older, and each day I'm just as blessed. Birthday cake from the family, housemates+neighbour housemates + slice of cake from housemate and mate...

And the many many wishes throughout the day, no matter whether through phone, sms, facebook msg / wall, all the way from overseas, outstation(now that I'm in Seremban)...

Thank you everyone. And I believe in my heart that each year, each day, I will slowly learn to take off on eagles wings, slowly learn to spread my wings.... =)

1.1.11

2011-01-01T17:15:00.001+08:00

1.1.11. Happy Blessed 2011 people! Have a blessed year with lots of love, joy and peace and everything good :O)

And a very happy blessed birthday to somebody special who has his birthday on the same date too! =)

December...or whats left of it?

2010-12-29T22:51:00.000+08:00

No...this place isn't dead :D

Its just that mua has been busy, and many things /events have been happening.

Can't believe December shot by...got what, 2 days left?

Lets just say...mua needs to buck up. Like, seriously. ~~Or else can throw myself into the ocean.~~

So yeah. Been experimenting on lots and lots of food, from chinese to western. I actually like cooking, using the oven...:D the only pains include preparation (like washing every leaf of each vege) and waiting for food to defrost ~~because I am oh so impatient.~~

On my side, I've just started surgery. well, 2nd week into surgery already. Still feel like a rookie / noob/ newbie, apa pun tak tahu...

All things work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes...

In fond memories of...

2010-12-09T18:07:00.000+08:00

I was chatting with a friend and noticed that he had linked me. He's got a new blog, and a very well thought out one, in my opinion! :) Welcome to the world of blogging, Tej! :)

I then saw that a mutual friend of ours, Tay had actually blogged bout my farewell here( bittersweet memories... >< ) He's a super duper amazing photographer, just in case you guys were wondering. And more than that, he's an amazing amazing friend whom I cherish and miss just like the rest of them back in IMU BJ.

You can get to their blogs by clicking on their names above. I've already linked them both in the sidebar too =)

I cant but marvel at this photograph. It brings back so, so much fond memories captured of 2 besties sharing a moment together. *nostalgia*

the 2 of my besties back in IMU. they are AWESOME. Hurt them and you die. I MEAN what I say. (wah ganas...but then again, who would protect them if I dont?)

And some of the amazing people who made it for the "farewell". These people (and those not in the photo as well) I truly sayangs betul betul. It was one of the hardest (but inevitable) thing to do, by leaving to seremban.

But friends are forever no? Wherever they are, I know I'm missing them and loving them, and that they always have me to fall back on if they ever need to. Thats what friends are for - they stay when everyone else have left...

Lots of love and hugs,

Tale of too many mosquitoes ]=

2010-12-08T21:39:00.000+08:00

Tale of too many mosquitoes ]=

1089214 mosquito bites everywhere, especially the legs. red spots everywhere, itching like... many many many ants biting and not going away. Booooooo ): ): ): ): ):

Tale of too many mosquitoes?

...Basically summed by 1 phrase:

I HATE U GUYS. ALL OF YOU.

ktxbye ):

Of wishes and Dreams

2010-12-01T18:52:00.001+08:00

They always say be careful about what you wish for, it might come true.

In more than one occasion over the past few weeks, I've personally experienced it. Sorta scary... :s :O >:|

...Gotta start watching what I wish and say.

ps: Welcome December. wait a minute...its December already!?! :O :O :O

To You

2010-11-30T13:02:00.002+08:00

me feels blessed and is grateful. Allow time for adjustment.

ktxbye :)

The Seremban Chronicles Continue...

2010-11-28T10:05:00.001+08:00

Finally! Some pictures that I'm happily uploading :D

Cendol @Haji Sariff

Cendol(normal) was good. But the company was what made it worthwhile. :)

Ellysyia @ Kampung Angkat Sejagong

Again I was placed in a semi-modern house...in a kampung. Haha. Anyway its true...that the villagers accept people with open arms and open hearts. And what we gave is nothing like what we got in return...be it the hospitality or care or even material wise. they may not have much, but they give freely...

MunYee@ KKS

A super cute adorable girl whom I was able to "bond" with during her 1/2 hour visit to the clinic. She's 4, and her mum is only 19! Her hyperactive self and not-afraid-of-anything + cheeky personality reminds me of my past(or what I hear of my past)...

On a lighter and random note, the other 3 girls (instead of just 1 initially) in the seremban pink party house is officially "taken" aka attached... :D

1+1 = ?

2010-11-25T21:37:00.002+08:00

Oh the horror :O

Aliaa

2010-11-22T23:37:00.019+08:00

As I walked by Kenny Rodgers @ Seremban Jusco yesterday, I saw a girl that resembled closely(coz im really not sure) a patient who had been hospitalized for close to 1 month. She came in pretty sick, and slowly became better over the next few weeks, before she was discharged.

That girl was eating, with her friends.

And suddenly I wondered how all "my" patients are doing. For all the time they stay in the hospital, all the time we painstakingly "stalk" their every history and do invasive investigations... our motive was, and will always be just to get them to get better, to be able to lead normal lives outside.

...And maybe that's why I live.

Irony

2010-11-18T14:45:00.000+08:00

Irony: the use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning.

-Dictionary.com

How ironic that the things we say and who we are outside is so different from who we are inside.

How I learnt the word:

friend:"....you? fat chance."

me: "oohh cool.. :)"

friend:"no dumbo, fat chance = slim chance"

me: "=.="

friend: now you know whats irony...

Its how when someone asks you: how are you?

and you answer with a smiley face "I'm fine, thank you!"

...When you're just dying inside

Friends don't have an expiry date

2010-11-17T17:39:00.000+08:00

Production date: - Insert date-of-birth-

Expiry date: Non-existent

...Because friends, especially good ones, don't have an expiry date. If I call you a friend, I'll never ever dump you aside / throw you away :)

-Dedicated to those whom I call friends whether you're near, here, far, somewhere else... -

It feels like Saturday

2010-11-16T23:52:00.001+08:00

Case summary is a pain in the gluteus maximus. How many hours and days just agonizing over it, trying to write something coherant, something complete. annoyingness ><.

On the bright side, my computer's Avira has been UN-installed, and the annoying "trojan" that apparently when googled is a gimmick to make me buy the original product (Which kept appearing way too often) is now gone! :D no more annoying "virus detection" sound :D

BAD-minton? not bad at all...

2010-11-14T22:52:00.002+08:00

Just back from badminton. It was...actually fun despite my super resistance initially to go.

*pauses, lost for words*

you know the times where you've got so, so much hidden inside your heart but you open your mouth and no words come out?

This is one such time.

"He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. "

Walking Talking Laughing

2010-11-11T21:15:00.000+08:00

Of uninterrupted long walks(by mosquitoes and what nots), beautiful nature, good friends, nice food, simple joys.

Somedays, much as I try I'm just not able to wipe that childlike grin off my face. :)

And a piece of me just dies

2010-11-10T22:49:00.000+08:00

When everything seems ok on the outside but the hurt is buried deep inside...

People say "move on" too easily. Its idiotic people whom hang on cause they they reminisce. They reminisce cause they poured out they life, their soul, their everything...

...And a piece of me just dies inside.

Sem 2's Survivor's story

2010-11-06T13:07:00.001+08:00

This is dedicated to my beloved sem 2 friends (and juniors, which in this case is apt).

"Once upon a time, there was this girl who was wanted to "be a doctor". She was just fresh from college, raring to do medicine. She happily enrolled herself in none other than IMU.

Semester 1 came and went, with herself barely studying. The last 3 weeks before exams she "played slides" everyday. Summative 1 came. She passed...but barely.

Semester 2 commenced. She resolved to STUDY her ass off. Didn't even join orientation - only did first aid for the juniors. Studies? Oh, stress levels were high...probably synonymous to the pressure cooker enough to cook a huge chicken. He memory was somewhat like "Touch and go" - study and forget. Or rather, study and remember for 293seconds, then forget.

Believe me, it was one of the most stressful and painful periods of her life. All around her people asked each other simple questions - like "name me 3 features of the large intestine". and her mind will go blank, she'll panic. worst still, she was studying "randomly" - din't even know things in the study guide (wait, there was a study guide? :O )

She crashed. So. so many times. Tears, dark eye circles like nobody's business, zombie-ing days, no difference between nights and days... the routine was stare at notes / fall asleep / stare at notes/ go to toilet with notes... with no avail. (Since nothing was retained in the mind.). The fear of failure naturally loomed at the back of her mind, haunting her every thought and action...

So yes. that was the 3 month nitemare( or somewhere there). to cut the long story short, her friends ( a few of them) were her solidarity, who supported her through the whole "ordeal". The "library gang" would encourage each other, have dinner together from all the godness-knows-how-healthy-roadside-food and then continue studying till the Indian aunty will knock the cup rhythmically calling out "library closing! library closing!!!" ...

The exam came, and the exam went.

And she passed. Not by herself - by the grace of her God ; and also because of her amazing friends who were amazing enough to share and care unselfishly - not just knowledge but the social support of just being there for each other. The sincerity when one genuinely goes "oi you BETTER study" instead of "don't worry, i din't study also" which obviously would be a lie. "

Hope. Faith. Love - Just hang on, finish strong!

I know I suck at writing. Bottom line is this - I've been there before, I know entirely how it feels. I'm the border line student who hangs on by bare thread thin line... I guess in the end, you just throw up your hands and go "I've done my best, this is it". As long as you know you've given it your all and you ever don't throw in the towel - to me that is success. Don't bother comparing with others - there will always be people better than you (and likewise, not as good). Do it for yourself, so that you can be proud of yourself. Do it for the hopes and aspirations of the future - your future patients deserve your time and dedication and hard work you put in now.

And don't lose sight of the whole picture - this is but temporary. Get through this and you will look back and ask yourself "How did I get through this!?" and remember it as a bittersweet moment. Of course, the 2 month holiday is a very good incentive to look forward to as well...

But ultimately ask yourself this question - Is it worth it? Because if it is, I'll give it my all, no holding back.
And if you ask me, someone who has been through the crap of Phase 1 - it is definitely worth it.

There are better times ahead. Look forward to that.

Love,
a survivor
(Excuse her - she hasn't written essays for ages)

Busy bz bz...

2010-10-29T14:24:00.000+08:00

This week spelled busy. Clinical exam (first time in Seremban), CFCS (Home visit report + theme 1 report + presentation slides) + internal med assignments (2 Case Reports (2000 words each) + 5 case summaries (300+ words each). ) Fantastic eh.

wanna blog with pictures next. stay tuned :) (if anyone ever reads this anymore

ps: To my sem 2 juniors and dentistry sem 4, all the best preparing for exams! u guys will do well :)

nameless

2010-10-15T14:25:00.000+08:00

No one ever said transition was going to be easy.

updates

2010-10-14T13:46:00.000+08:00

Its been more than a week now. 2 weeks left in internal medicine. its the usual, day after day, day after day.

Venepuncture aka blood drawing? better. but still need lots and lots of practice. i think my practical skills are like that, which means im not a "naturally talented" person but have to work on it. most probably my driving would be like that too, if i have chance to practice.

arrrgh. but yeah blabbing. yesterday had CP(Case presentation). made a dumbass mistake.presented the case. said the patient had chickenpox more than 30 years ago. so the doctor asked "what virus causes chicken pox?" \

my mouth shot out "herpes simplex". gg man. i KNOW its varicella zoster but somehow maybe at the back of my mind i was thinking herpes zoster. either way, embarassing. herpes simplex is an std -sexually transmitted disease. groans....

the doctor took it very nicely tho. aka no scolding. he reminded us (me?) of a few things - think before we speak, especially as doctors. and assume nothing.

got so much running in my head right now but I'm actually supposed to rest. PBL in bout 10-15 mins. I should really be more disciplined...

wake me up when september ends...?

2010-10-04T13:15:00.001+08:00

It seems like eternity I've been here. And yet. And yet... I know I'm not entirely settled yet. Esp after going home for 2 days then coming back. The feeling is...not the best. Gotta adjust. Just like the times I just returned, I can't sleep properly, keep waking up throughout the night.

Managed to draw blood. EASY ones. some poke patient's more than once and cause them pain, failed doctor :( my hands shake like crazy even tho I don't want it to. so much for thinking of doing surgery. or maybe I just to give myself some time. I'm probably one of the worst and slowest students around. But I will try, and hopefully be the best I can...

Still can't but feel wee bit dejected. Seriously. Everyone has their own challenges some are "harder" than the rest? I don't know what to say except that God, help me...

NEARLY lost. gosh.

2010-09-30T17:13:00.000+08:00

Was walking back to the car with my phone in hand.(BAD move. I so should NOT do it). got into the car, dropped in into my lap on the labcoat i was carrying.

Then I got out of the car to open the car door behind me.

"Eh, borrow phone, my phone no credit"...my friend went bout 5-10 minutes later.i was going to pull out my phone and suddenly I just could NOT find it. I sorta freaked inside, since this isn't the first time in a short while I lost something important...again :/

Retraced my steps back to the car park bout 3 mins away, and it was under the next car, just beside the wheel. Reverse the car(thank God we finished early no one was out yet), and my phone is gone.

Really really thank God. Seems like even when I'm unaware He does care and watch out for me. Just a phone, but its important...I so need bigger pockets :/

passing thoughts

2010-09-28T23:59:00.000+08:00

Different things remind me of different people I love and miss. I seem to see them (and then end up disappointed coz obviously its not them) so many places... :(

"SHIT! MI!"

2010-09-24T00:01:00.000+08:00

On call tonight. Went to A & E instead of wards. What to do? A &E my "first love" (or one of it).

Did another ECG today. Non supervised one, I mean. ACS (Acute coronary syndrome). Ok lah. Ran over to ask stupid question, but was ok in the end.

Then there was another Indian male that needed an ECG. All my friends were crowding around him.

So I thought ok, I'll just let them do it and keep my mouth shut. Slowly find leads, slowly print the paper...

Then they asked me how to operate the thing (what the doctors want). And then the ecg it din't come out nice. But instead of reading what I could, I decided to redo. The 3rd time the doctor came over, and while i was telling him "not really nice" he was scanning through the leads he then went : "SHIT! MI!"( MI - Myocardial Infarction aka heart attack).

And when he was scanning through I saw the ST elevation. I felt like "..."

Later on the poor patient was counselled on treatment and possibilities etc, and finally went I left he was just intubated. Hopefully he recovers. He has a family waiting for him...

Moral of the lesson, at least for me: Emergency Department, you really gotta take things seriously, and a bit faster. You never know that few minutes could actually help the patient? Just my 2 cents, at least.

Suffers...

2010-09-22T20:36:00.000+08:00

Ulcer the size of 2cm x 1cm. Started last week with two mini sized dots and they grew and grew, and gradually decided that a union would be a happy thing, much to the dismay and despair of the poor body. The whole body has been well and truly weakened and put to much suffering due to the extreme pain felt throughout the whole day for a few days now :'(

Evilness...

Internal Med

2010-09-08T18:28:00.001+08:00

Internal Med

Actually like internal med. Then again, I expected I would like it. BUT, tbl's? different story.

Still much adjustment to be made. Still lost around wards (altho i do like it) but I would love to start doing procedures (like assisting in the ECG today, thanks to my nursing friend). So far cases I've seen have been pretty ok, really thank God for that. (I mean, I feel sorry for the patient. I'm just grateful I have the chance to see these patients to enhance my knowledge and experience).

Slowly my friends are leaving one by one. Ash leaves tonight, Sooky left already. Both UK pple. Now, our gang is complete here in s'ban, save for Sook. :'( But it's ok. Its not goodbye, I believe.

Learning to be generous and patient in dealing with life. By that I mean housemates / people etc. Learning to give and take, to smile and not take offences (compared to younger days?) and much much more. Learning humility and much much more.

Will update soonish. Have a safe flight Ash, you will be missed. Sook, I hope you're doing well there. Boring? we're crazy busy right now. But still miss you guys!

ps: during tbl today the patient's heart monitor sounds "tut...tut...tut..." sound was sorta "ringing" in my head. Does ward rounds do this to you?

Seremban, 12.10am

2010-09-06T00:15:00.001+08:00

Seremban, 12.10am

Back in Seremban the previous evening. Buzzed around just doing all the random stuff. Then Jaer and Mohawk-hair-now-gone came visiting for quite some time before they left.

Sitting in front of my computer right now, I actually got tons to read up on. Now the grind starts again. Except this time, we have loads more work then back in pre-clinical phase...What you learn in a month is condensed into a week or less than that. And this includes the clinical part that we could afford to skip the last time.

Just yawned. Somehow, there is a "quiet" sense of loneliness today, this moment. But I suddenly remembered that "All things work for good for those who love God and are called according to His purposes".

I shall trust.

Capricorn

2010-09-03T02:03:00.002+08:00

CAPRICORN

Seen on a fb wall-to-wall and actually, long long ago many many times in the emails...

"CAPRICORN - The Passionate Lover (December 22 to January 19) Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Grouchy at times and annoying to some. Lazy and love to take it easy, but when they find a job or something they like to do they put their all into it. Proud, understanding and sweet. Irresistible. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Cool. Loves to win against other signs in sports, especially Gemini's. Likes to cook but would rather go out To eat at good restaurants. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart."

Not sure how true it actually is? I for one think that I fit "some" of the traits but dare not acclaim others like "Sassy, sexy, smart". hahaha. Comments are very much welcome :D (well actually I highly doubt I got a readership base...)

Joanne is...

2010-09-02T23:41:00.000+08:00

Joanne..

..Is tired. I really should make it a point to sleep early. Last few late nights included crashing each others rooms, talking stories etc.

...is not so cranky/ emo. True enough there is much transition / adjustment to make. But fingers crossed, it'll be in good time?

...is going home tomorrow.

...Has assignments already. Need to do homework this weekend...

Titleless

2010-08-31T23:31:00.001+08:00

Was supposed to go to "Carrefour" to "avoid feeding the mosquitoes" and to "get air-cond". End up not getting there (getting lost lah, summore dark at night) but ending up at "A n W" instead. Talking (more of listening) to random stuff but mostly on happenings such as human trafficking, syndicates that sell girls into prostitution and others into begging and more. And of how "Efficient" our country is in giving out PR statuses. Personal opinions shall not be revealed here, but suffice to say that our nation has much to learn, much to grow, much to improve on in many, many aspects.

Having said that, it would not be fair if I din't say I'm privileged to be in this nation, where the sun abounds (albeit too brightly and hot) and the harmony is still very much preserved here. Happy birthday Malaysia, may each year bring you much progress, especially in those aspects that we need to work on.

I thought I was ok

2010-08-31T17:16:00.007+08:00

I thought I was ok, sorta settled. Well not exactly. I knew that the feeling , the tears just had to come. Its just a matter of when.

Dad and mom came down for a visit (coz they din't pass me the money the last time they were here). So yeah. And brought along food, a huge lifesaver coz it was house cleaning day and coz our house has a stove but no gas yet.

They just left bout 20 mins ago? And along with the image of them leaving was the stream of tears that I contained till I reached my room. And the "washing machine" is spinning, in Fida's vocab. Till now. Is it a case of homesickness or pms or just pure stress over the last few days... I really don't know.

I din't forsee it being this hard. Well maybe I did, but not like this. My friends just opened my door and saw me. I couldn't say a word,. Its just sobs now. They left me alone, I'm not sure tho if thats the best thing to do.

I think having a heart pumping with fresh blood is both a blessing and a pain - to love means it hurts no? And when you love you give. Its always an unbalanced equation...

Of "Early Christmas" and Cockroaches

2010-08-30T23:13:00.000+08:00

Of "Early Christmas" and Cockroaches

It was past midnite in the "pink party house" (As Sook calls it), and nobody's asleep as of yet. Everbody(nearly) was helping lala king to fix his mosquito netting in his room. Tedious work, and "Self sacrificing" (since the superglue trickled onto nearly everyone's fingers and it peels of...with the epidermis layer of the skin too!

In the background is some very very old Christian music, with Hawaiian flavour with the "soothing Christmas songs" feel. So yeah...Christmas came early.

On the side of the house I heard a "Scream". "Ahhhhhhhh!" It....was a baby cockroach. Sprayed it a few times as its feet pattered up and down the wardrobe, probably more scared of us then we of it....

Day 2 of moving into Seremban "new" house(coz its actually a super duper old house), with the new "Family". The feeling is still new, but I can't seem to put my finger on the adjective to use to describe how I feel.

Summary of today's first day at IMU Clinical school : talks and more talks, with a sombre / depressing mood on a whole. To be honest, felt sorta "abandoned" and forlorn here. Meeting the seniors from IMU BJ somehow wasn't like "Waaaaaa, nice to meet u!!!" I mean, sure it was, but it was a more "Serious", like "hi you're here good luck!" kinda feeling, if you get me. The "youthfulness" and the enthusiasm in IMU BJ was to me, visibly lacking...

And I miss my family back in KL. Both my blood related, and my IMU family. Thanks for the few messages I got throughout the day. Know that I miss you guys...

Seremban

2010-08-29T23:38:00.001+08:00

Seremban

And so, here I am, officially a clinical student. Time passes super duper fast... can't believe its end of August already.

A few pictures of my room, taken with my phone camera. Lighting is different in the night. So maybe looks different? I'm not sure. But apparently my housemates vote it as the most "homey" one, with all of them vowing to buy posters and deco stickers to "beat" me in my room design :P

Study table / windows/ bed

Bed/ Table(to put stuff?)/ DECO STICKERS :p

Wardrobe/ shelves/door

Should be able to orientate yourself to the layout of the room no? Its fairly simple.

Hopefully I'll be able to orientate myself to the "Seremban phase"( as I call it ) soon...For now the feeling hasn't properly set in yet. Its like I wanna cry but tears don't come out, I don't know how to feel...

Of Photo Frames and Not Knowing what to Pack

2010-08-27T23:21:00.000+08:00

Of Photo Frames and Not Knowing what to Pack

Had a super relaxed-just-talk-walking-round with one of my besties. Eating at Food Garden, Gardens, then walking all around MV. And I really mean walking all over for hours. :) No "timing" to care about since we were't going to catch movies, no errands to run... It was some time since we actually did that (walk around the whole of MV). Remember our most unhealthy dinner of a drink +a piece of sushi each + 2 boxes of ice -cream mini poppers? :O

Before she left my home, I finally managed to give Sook her super-belated birthday gift cum token of remembrance to Leeds. I, in return , got my own photo frame, with a "secret msg" hidden under. Which I actually found out coz I look at the small details (there were wooden splinters which I wanted to remove)

The photo which had a "secret msg" written on the back

Apparently she wondered if I would find it years later...too bad plan foiled! :p

Super nice eh? Sook was always the creative one :) The "Joanne" was written on the back of scrabble loose tiles. Not bad since I love scrabble myself! :) I can only say I love the gift... and I'll miss you loads! Remember you're supposed to come sleepover at my "blue room"!

Nearing the End

2010-08-26T02:51:00.001+08:00

So many things to do all of a sudden. I wonder if I'll get to bed tonight (tho I'm sitting on my bed)... I'll probably sleep out of exhaustion.

Packing is still being done. Wasn't home the whole day, but it was a good day. Met some people I haven't see in a while, celebrated ChengChun's birthday cum Chill 1st anniversary, went to the dentist aka awesome Sab at IMU for a proper checkup after 15 years (yes...how shameful eh), and had a farewell dinner for the UK bound people who are leaving in these 2 weeks.

Group photo of all the MEDT108 attendees! Really gonna miss all these people :')

My own farewell by Sexiest + Cobra's + Chill(?) is gonna be tonight. I'm gonna move stuff to Seremban in the morning / late afternoon, so I'm really keeping my fingers crossed that I can come back in time!
Will update more when I actually can. Hoping there are no waterworks that are unnecessary...

Packing

2010-08-24T15:43:00.001+08:00

Packing

Sooky is right...closer to exams / when we're stressed out bout something our usage of facebook/ blogposts increase. It is as if stress is proportionate to Facebook / blogging :P

Been somewhat packing today. Sorting out clothes to bring to Seremban. True, I may not have so much problem (like luggage weight prob) like those going overseas...but I still do have to pack and its not easy. "Splitting" oneself, the memories, the everything into half...Somewhat. I'm just not sure what to expect. Sighs.

Tomorrow night we're having a farewell dinner for those UK bound people whom are leaving in these 2 weeks. A sense of lingering sadness, of fondness of the many memories shared. Why is it that people always have to leave??

And Thursday night, is my own "Farewell" with my beloved "juniors". I've took them as my friends all these while. Apparently the venue hasn't been set yet since a current head count of 64 people are going. If you ask me thats crazy...Its like having a mini wedding reception :O Talk bout when one REALLY gets married :-O
I don't know how one person is gonna talk to like , 60+ people at a time. SIMPLY IMPOSSIBLE. Lol. haha.

The crazy things we do.

I'm...gonna miss these people. These people who have brightened my days, these people who kacau me puas puas, these people whom I love and love me too. These people whom I have opened my heart and shared my life with. It is not goodbye...coz good friends stay together through the years, distance and time notwithstanding...

My very first (and last?) treasure hunt in IMU BJ.

...My room is in an utter mess... Just like the condition of my heart.

Half baked potatoes aka convocation

2010-08-21T18:28:00.001+08:00

Half baked potatoes aka convocation

2.5 years of medical school, of pre-clinicals in IMU. Today we celebrated the end - We made it through phase one!!! But at the same time also it is a transition, and a tough one - taking up a huger responsibility as a student doctor, where lives of people are involved.

101 feelings I felt today, sitting as a "graduate" of ME108 Phase 1 convocating class ... bittersweet mostly.

Beloved parents + 2 of my besties Ash and Sooky :)

Will update more later with more photos and what nots. But I must tell you that I was really, really touched that my juniors namely Siew See, Ruby and Fida self assembled the bouquet of flowers + graduating bear you see in the picture and presented it to me!

Thank you all of you guys for making my 2.5 years memorable. I really love you guys, and will miss all of you...

Thanks for the Memories

2010-08-10T18:23:00.002+08:00

Thanks for the Memories

The bits and pieces of the well deserved holidays with some pictures. Somehow I already miss these memories...

Coffeeshop talk

Watching football at a coffeeshop with the others (And guys too actually lol). It was the match of I think spain(?) vs Korea, where the Korea fella scored home goal.

Mango Lassi :D officially one of my favourite drinks :D

Sandip finally took us to Kabul @ KL Sentral (inside Sooka's building) for north indian food. Super nice. From the naans to the dhal to the butter/ tandoori chicken etc. Anyone wants me to recommend I'll recommend this one. The price is really reasonable too. Everyone was so stuffed we din't bother doing anything else (like camwhoring :P )

Karaoke.

I don't know how many times of Karaoke we went. My housemates are karaoke fans. :P Oh but yes we found out some stuff. Like how Sam(Red shirt) can rap and how Kel (black shirt funny expression) and Morgan sing Korean songs like "Gee" and others(think SNSD & Wonder girls ) XD And how EeWei has a good voice etc. :)

Sushi-ing with the ladies.

@Sushi Zenmai , Gardens. from left - Cheryl, June , Parisha, with BOLD makeup, me, Sookie super well dressed :D and Zia. It was fun just sushing and talking. We talked/ laughed so loud that a waiter had to slightly embarrassedly ask us to tone down. We decided that it was time to leave :P

Genting trip

Happy red victorious (belated) 21st babe! :)

As I wrote in earlier posts, the Genting trip finally happened. It was also actually a surprise celebration for my bff Sookie's 21st. Which I'm happy to note, was a real surprise to her :D

The awesome birthday girl + delicious cake

I went miles (literally :P), going from where we were to another different place bout 5-6 floors up in a completely different building to get the cake. Chocolate mud cake with the button like coffee on the sides and white chocolate toppings :) Everyone oohed and aahhhhed at the cake, exclaiming that it was REALLY good. Ah well, best cake shop in Genting, the Bakery. Found no where else :D

This is how a holiday should be like...relaxing!

Haha could pass off as a very very good ad. Too bad so many of the things were closed that day...space shot, for instance. And when it started to rain in the afternoon...

Exhilarating :D

Now I sorta regret not going for painball. hahaha. Before we left Genting, the guys called to say they were on the top floor going to "shoot". So we went up. Watching them play (Jaer followed by Sandip) my heart felt "moved" to play too... but it was nearly time to leave! Haha. My Sifu Sandip again just told me "just go pay and play ony!" I sure don't regret it. Was taught how to shoot a gun. Aiming etc. First few shots were wayyyyy out as I had NO idea how to aim (supposed to be through that little hole I'm supposed to look through) but when I properly started on the 4th try(I paid for 20 "ammo") it was 9.8, 9.9, 10 around those lines. SUPER DUPER exhilarating! :) Sugar rush man. :D :D :D

Lit people are creative people? :)

The bunch of literature gang that went up. Behind you can see "sound and lighting", and there's blind Teresias in front with the beautiful Oracle. We were supposed to portray what we were. But I was the emcee and credits song performer. What could I do? :O

Group shot :)

Before we officially left, we gathered to have a group shot. I have no idea whats with the lame ultraman signs. haha -_____- It was a good day. And I'm gonna remember the memories for a long, long time :)

Final "event" and pictures that follows!

North Indian food @ Passage thru India , Damansara

Morgan awestruck by the food

This time,Parisha hosted us to North Indian food in Damansara at a place called Passage thru India. The food is very,very good. I must caution you however, do bring enough money as this place is pricey. Its literally nearly double the price of the food @ Kabul KL Sentral.

Mouth watering much? :P

Butter chicken, various naans and something I cant identify. All of which tasted good.

Group pic.

Haha dunno if u consider this a "family photo". Its a funny one if so :P This is one in which u could see the exquisite interior designing lah. While I was googling it, I found out that there is also a branch at Pearl's International Hotel. Hmm....

Fuyoooh!~

Outside, ~~I pestered aka bossed the guys to pose~~ the guys decided to do "creative posing" for photos. You must agree this is a brilliant shot ~~thanks to the photographer~~ :P

Model shot of (fill in the blanks) magazine cover

The girls however, are not so easily beaten...as can be seen from the picture above. I love this shot too. Gotta thank good lighting for this one, just like the last one too :)

This finally concludes the picture post of these fond memories of the holidays. Full set of pictures can be accessed under an album by itself "Post EOS5 Chilling/ Outing".

...August means that people are leaving soon, and many of us going to Seremban. Things won't be the same again, what with everyone everywhere, life constantly revolving... but I know these are the memories that are treasured deep within me, that never fails to bring out a smile... and that wherever you guys all are, you'll all always be a part of my fond memories :)

Embracing August...

2010-08-07T11:59:00.002+08:00

And before I know it, 1/4 of August has passed. Very very soon its gonna be end of August, which also signifies the end of my holidays...and the start of a grinding 2.5 years in Seremban as a clinical student. One step closer to the doctor I've always wanted to be...but I can only imagine(for now) the amount of grueling training and the immense sacrifice we the students will have to make. Having said that, I'm only the wee-est(if there is such a word) bit excited. Most of me just does not know what to expect, what to anticipate.

What have I been doing for the past 1 week? "mourning" for my lost stuff. Hence the sounding from Fifi telling me "I wanna see a happy post, I don't care if lame". But the fact is that those were my most prized possessions... how to not feel sad over them?

NEARLY am at the "last phase" of sorting out accommodation issues in my future house. Fingers crossed, will be signing the tenancy agreement this coming week. Then there is the issue of furniture...like the fridge. To get a 1 door fridge? and bed frame etc etc etc? haha. and the proper "moving in". So yes, time to get busy busy busy again...

Plans this week : hoping to make a trip down to either PD aka the polluted seas of port dickson(unless we can find a not polluted one...any ideas? or a Melaka trip(for the food lah, duh). Not exactly going there to see Mahsuri / the A Famosa / the whats-it-called-i can't remember ~~drain~~ well XD Sorry lah, but seen once seen twice don't fancy it thrice. Or maybe the famous jonker street? we shall see :)

Till then...I'm gonna "enjoy" the rest of my hols... (Don't get me wrong, I really do find this it-doesn't-matter-what-time-I-wake-up and no-101-notes-to-finish life a rare bliss :P )

day 4...n still heartsick

2010-08-05T07:18:00.001+08:00

Sigh. Its been a while since I've properly updated. But this time I couldn't bring myself to even blog bout it. Just sitting down, staring at the phone / post hoping someone returns it...

Been working weekends. Initially for fun la. (Now I don't quite feel it). During the last day of my 3 week work, I dropped my purse outside IOI mall (near the staff entrance) on the floor where cars zoom by. Sighs... It must have dropped coz I took out my purse to zip it, left it on my lap n when I got out of the car it dropped. Arrrgggghhhhhhhhh....the nightmare that follows.

I lost everything inside - down from my IC, Driver's licence, atmcard, student id (all these have to remake, all with costs over hundreds as well) ON TOP of my NEW MP3 which is barely a few months old worth RM200++.... AND my house keys (had to change to locks) plus my seremban wardrobe keys which means I can't use that 2 locked drawers (coz they're already locked). *sniff*

When I realised it was probably 2-3 minutes later...and when I rushed back it was gone. How many times I retraced my footsteps and checked the sides, it was well and truly gone. All in all that 2-3 minutes of carelessness cost me bout RM500++. It is, as my dad said, an expensive lesson. Esp that the mp3 was supposed to be my companion when I'm sad / lonely in Seremban.

Everyone asks me to be positive. It was super hard. Till now...Till the point I dreamt that it was returned to me, but when I wake up it was... but a dream. I did try to console myself at least it isn't 5000, but it was truly one mistake I never saw coming. Extremely grateful for pple like person2go2 (you know who u are) who drove all the way through the jam to pick me from my place to make a new ic and take me back again. Probably used up like 2-3 hours of his precious time. Thanks for just helping me out through this seriously difficult time. And for those who try consoling / encouraging me. For just listening /bearing with me.

I'm sorry if my temper has been on the edge...I noticed it too. And I'm not someone whose temper flares up, but when another is insensitive and speaks brashly, I seriously find that really hard to accept. I mean, who am I right? But sometimes silence is better than words that hurt..not that you realize it, do you?

Like a few pple Fifi and Chip reminded me, these things that I've lost are replaceable. In that sense I've got something to be grateful for. And even after that episode I still had to go back to work...(remember I was working) One customer was telling me in life that we always are on the "rugi" (shorter end of the stick) side 'once in a while'...but at least it affects us when we still can take it, meaning it doesn't affect our lives so much (compared to if that say, RM200 meant life and death...or livelihood to one).

So if I seem upset, now you know why. Please don't ask me to recount the details anymore, its rather painful. ...Sometimes I just wish I had the option to turn back time.

OMG. SUPER LAME WEI

2010-07-19T23:52:00.001+08:00

OMG. SUPER LAME WEI

Conversation with Wei Hoong over msn....How I miss these people.

hoonghoong says:
hahahah
eat more butter
then when you learn how to fly
you can become butterfly
woohoo!!

Ahhhhh. How I miss that humour. And how I miss every other thing. Life....

I'll like to make myself believe...that planet earth turns, slowly.... -Fireflies-

Random musings

2010-07-14T12:24:00.001+08:00

Random musings

To be very honest, I have been doing nearly nothing but lazing /bumming around since I finished exams :D

First off, I moved my computer from the table to beside my bed, so I literally live beside my computer - That would probably explain my super prompt replies esp at Facebook huh ;p

Next , I just can't find the energy to do anything else - including reading a book (even novels). The sign of them just sends me to sleep. I haven't even watched Moulin Rouge which I downloaded weeks ago!! Instead, what I do is just close my eyes - "rest". The bliss of not having a 101 things to complete (well there are things I'm supposed to do which I'm sitting on, of course), such as the stack of notes to finish. I don't exactly miss that time ;p

Something random I saw on a shirt in a hypermarket

I do, however, miss my IMU phase 1 life, especially the library moments. Of sitting at the "gungho - sem 1 -study till 6pm " group aka Sexiest back in 2009 to the "fish market" table aka co13ras in 2010...I miss the moments. At times I'll just sit reflecting random moments like how "monkey" , "monster" and "nonsense" was the favourite words of Geena , Sofiah, Jolene and the other m109's, how Mae Yee will get bullied by the likes of Wei Hoong "Disgusting" ....to how the chatterboxes of my beloved co13ras will start chatting away in mandarin, and the random (girl's) "Tie Day".

I remember the moments where Ruby would just sit beside me as I stone, and force me to eat something as I barely had the appetite to eat(crispy chicken or a muffin)...to Hoong2's favourite repetitive term "Don't worry, be happy" and his all-time-lame sentence "I give you bile, make you smile" (or something along those lines). Those, and many more have been my comfort so so many times when I was too distressed to even speak.

MaeYee, Ruby, Hoong2. SeXIest lives on forever =)

Fast-forwarding to 2010, the appearance of "Mangkuk" and many many more. "lil bro" Sze Jun, we-love-hugs Alex, Sexy Jit Tong, Siew See(Sexy) , Mr. Intelligent - Thinkalot Shane, Turtle Pencil-case-always get stolen Crystal... and more. They cheer me up in so so many ways. I'm smiling as I remember how I'll give some of them (like Alex, Fida) a hug each day when we meet and when one of us is going home. Its a "routine" that I grew accustomed to looking forward to. How all of us would not hesitate to offer advice or help whenever needed. To be honest, I was pretty useless as a senior... I din't do anything for them. They (my friends aka juniors in Imu) instead were 1 of the greatest sources of sunshine in my life. :')

(Most of) The lot of them from the "fish market" table XD

I don't regret knowing anyone of them / all of you (Coz I'm not sure if many of you will ever read this)... It is truly a great honour and privilege of mine to know all of you, who you are, sincere and real people. You guys leave me nothing but fond memories, and the amazing feeling of being immensely blessed by knowing each and everyone of you. :)

The practice video of variety night. It was funnier during practice somehow.

Sorry for the quality...people were moving about

Here is something I never posted up for all of you to watch, the variety night practice video. Its the best I could take... ps: Here at least it's SCIENTIFIC breakthrough not medical breakthrough that earned us a QC ;P And I can't help but laugh at the stupid dance moves everyone was making at the end to the song "Umbrella" XD

Propwall

2010-07-13T18:03:00.008+08:00

PropWall

Was reflecting on the recent change in events...of how complications can arise just like that and it really takes effort to resolve it. It was an equal headache to search for a house in Seremban , but now that thats done...

I actually went through many many websites, trust me on that. 1001 or maybe more websites, night after night searching for a place to stay...

Later on, I was introduced to a super nicely designed website Propwall, a Malaysia Property website. To my surprise , it is actually worth a visit...the website layout is very soothing to the eye and more importantly , it is very updated and with lots of traffic. They even have more than 1,000 property analysis articles and 40,000 high quality property photos [all of which look very very chic and modern and classy ;) ], and all organized in such a way that is easy to navigate searching!

However, if you ask me the downside , there is one major one - The majority of places advertised are either based in Kuala Lumpur or Selangor. Only slightly more than 100 properties out of roughly 1600 properties are based in areas outside KL and Selangor. And the properties are also on the pricey side (you pay for class too right)

Apart from that , I find this website really good. Not only it is informative, with the asking price stated clearly, there are ample quality photos to view the properties. I often find it a turnoff when prospective sellers refuse to cooperate by giving enough photos - I won't even bother contacting the person in charge !

So yes, if I were you, and searching for a place to buy / rent , I'll definitely give this website a go ;)

Relief

2010-07-01T11:37:00.001+08:00

Relief

I can finally say I feel slightly relieved right now. Today, I declare, is a good day. =) And I hope it stays the same for the week, the month(s) and year(s) ahead :)

Finally sorta finalized the accommodation for Seremban. Gotta admit that working with people (4 other housemates) is challenging. A lot of tolerance, give and take, and heartache is involved. But ultimately, I know these people for 2 - 3 years already... And I know they're good people. Just different people have different quirks and fancies....which we'll have to get used to when staying together.

Its been a week of staying at home for me. Well not exactly, since I've been having a 2 hour per day refresher course for driving for the past 3 days including today. It ended at 9.45am this morning. Yes, waking up to alarms these 2 days...uggghhhh D: But I can say that I can drive now :) pretty confidently? back/ reverse park, hill / upslope even during times of traffic jams... :D cause for celebration haha.

thinking of taking up random part time jobs. preferably ushering jobs la. that I know I can, looking around for these 1-3 days contract thing since I daren't commit fully.

Genting trip is next wednesday...hopefully finalized :) waiting for replies, then can go buy tickets already. Ahhhh, time with my batchmates :)

*This is such a scatterbrain post, just like the others*

wrote down a list stuff I need to bring /get / pack / buy for seremban. I'm not sure how I feel actually...its a mixture of feelings. Oh the room is pretty big tho so if anyone wants to come crash you're always welcome... :)

Things I've done this hols:
- Finished a 6- hour driving refresher course
- Watched a few movies - Toy story 3 (loves loves loves), Dear John, The Notebook, Hairspray, REwatched the sound of music (many many times! coz the mucic is awesome), How to tame a dragon...
- FINALLY filed up my sem 5 notes
- kept my fingernails long .I can pluck (guitar) now :D even songs like Hallelujah. haha.
- Went Karaoke for the first time with Ange / Kel / Eewei / Morgan / Sam for the first time, IOI Red box. Pretty fun..some got hidden talents like rapping hahaha
- went house hunting 2 days in seremban. so yeah...thats done.
- Went back to IMU to help juniors with patient interview (hopefully it helped them , I know I tried my very best writing cases for them and commenting on how to improve). matter of fact is that many doctors nowadays fail to properly interact with patients. I can't say I'm the best, but I'll definitely try to be a doctor who knows her stuff and cares for the patient as well. - and also help with CSU practice. I could finally see the difference after 1.5 years doing csu. There is difference between sem 3 and sem 5. Again, cases and techniques. I'm honoured to have taught these people tho I know I have lots to learn myself.
- Semi - cleared my bed (meaning I still need to clear , lah)
- Semi - cleared my table (lies ....it looks just as messy as it was when I was studying :/ )

What I want to do:
- Go running. Properly. Havn't done so in a few months...and I love my running shoes.
- Go Genting! (well its the friends that matter. really...I always go genting ,so its not genting that attracts me)
- Stand in a windy place (Say a sandy place / fields) and blow bubbles (you know , the little bottles of coloured soap water you used to blow as a child? )
- change my blog layout. Got ideas but no skill. Anyone care to help? :(
- hmm actually cant think. haha
- tbc - to be confirmed :P

Hopefully no one was reading on till this long. People have always always commented that I write too long? The thing is, this is my blog. A place where I 'spill' whatever I wanna say , irregardless of what people think (of course, writing with consideration to others feelings as well, to a certain extent). The reason why it's actually so long is coz I pent up things inside. like a bottle filling up? Then it sorta "Explodes". Not the best thing to do tho....

Remember the mixed feelings I said I have. Some reasons I will not care to elaborate, but others...I'm gonna miss a lot of people from IMU. From my batchmates esp some of them, my orientation groups and the individual people...there are too many to name. Sexiest, and the likes rocker mommy / ever amazing jamming buddy Ruby , Eldwin, Chill, my "cute little brother" Cheeyip, Cobras, with the many many people like mangkuk Fida , introspective Shane, "chinese" brother wedeling aka Sze Jun, mirror Jit Tong, and many many many more whom if I have to list, I'll probably have pages full(depending on the size of the paper :P )

*heaves a sigh*

am lost for words for the moment. lost in thought...

Sneak peek of where I'll be for the next 2 years. lol

post eos5

2010-06-17T10:34:00.001+08:00

POST EOS 5

I can't believe its been a week since the BIG EXAM in IMU, EOS5. This time last week Sooky and I were still trying some last minute practice on my beloved juniors. I tell you, I have juniors who rock. I can practice csu/ osce in the library and the pbl room as much and as when I please. Lol.

Anyway, pms results are out for everyone else. Why everyone else? Coz I'm part of the local programme, I already knew my next 2.5 years destination since sem 5 began, unlike the anticipation my pms friends had to go through. Congrats to most of my frenz who got their 1st/ 2nd choice...and even those who din't get their top few choices but got pretty good schools too. It is pretty ironic that you can set your mind to a certain continent / country...and be sent to the other :D haha. only IMU can do that to you. But in the end you realise that all is for the better?

went out a few time so far. Pizza hut lunch / midvalley walkabout + ice-cream dinner with sooky, / A - team movie + sushi / bangsar banana leaf + shopping + mango ice cream shake! awesome stuff I tell you. most pictures are with Sooky with her sexilicious camera... :D so we shall wait. I have a few which I will post up :D

My shopping kaki :D

I think the expression on the cute paper bag that Ash's holding sums up our feelings aptly that day : )

I like the this picture - it has our drinks / desserts, and Sooky in a never-seen-before-cute-pouting-face :p

Oh just so you know...the mango ice cream Sooky and Ash had was called "dress me up" (coz it has mango pieces. the "bare" one with just mango is called "Yo Naked". hahaha I rememeber all of us having a bit of difficulty reading out the name when we first went there during my birthday celebration. haha. (Now we read without batting an eyelid :P )

Ahhhh. Havn't gone out with her in a long LONG time. *hugs*

The last was sem 4 with the likes of Dr Leow and what nots :P

Also had a pretty fun time "jamming" with Ruby in LT2 yesterday. Playing random songs from Edelweiss to "The moon represents my heart" (yeah old time chinese song) to Mandy Moore's "Only Hope" to the final big bang Switchfoot's "Dare you to move"...it was fun with Ruby on the piano and me on guitar. I have NEVER played so much or so hard for a long long time...welcome the calluses on my fingertips now hahaha.

We call each other mommy :) Love the way she plays the piano :)

We had a few camwhore shots before we left...I think this is the most "presentable" one hahaha. It was fun just chilling out, eating lunch, playing songs on our piano / guitar, singing and watching Ruby with her airguitar :) One heck of a rocker mummy :)

And tomorrow...the results are revealed. I wish and hope and pray for good results..all of us do. Dearest wish? Whole of M108 passes both theory and osce papers. That, would be a good dream come true :)

I remember...

2010-06-11T23:46:00.001+08:00

EOS 5 is finally over...Its been months and months of suppressed mixed feelings and of a hectic hectic schedule. its been crazy, studying the 9 body systems (and forgetting) and studying again and the cycle continues.

I guess I'm really at a loss now. I actually am not sure how I really feel, how its gonna be. There are surely gonna be many changes, some anticipated, some not.

For one, I'm really really gonna miss alot of my friends. From batchmates to my many many juniors and library furniture - mates and many good friends I've gained along the way. We've seen each other for as long as one sem (A few months) to 2.5 years...and its was an awesome time getting to know every single one of these people who have touched my life in so, so , so many ways. The journey that we shared, through sweat, joy, shouting, agony, tears, pain, boring lectures, combine tables lunches, random karaoke at piano sessions and all. All these things bring back fond memories, and a little sense of sadness in me as well. (not so little, but yeah).

I remember our M108 orientation days, where we had the most ridiculous (and cutest and hilarious and funkiest) animals / plants. The swan. The hamster. The asparagus. The peacock. The lotus. The bunny. BARNEY!!! and more.

I remember the mornings our beloved batch rep will make announcement with the microphone...with an "option" (Coz he'll do it anyway) of him singing for us. Voted most responsible, syiok sendiri, most... he truly holds many titles.

I remember the many lame moments we shared. From the most boring or random moment where a cold "joke" will come our from no where and cause the -___- feeling. I think we have a lecturer that sorta fuels the f-lame. awesome right :D

I remember the 2 IMU cups in 2008 and 2009, MEDT BANG BANG BANG and Hydra House. Remember playing darts for hours and hours. Remember screaming at the top of my lungs cheering my batch / house's cheerleading squad.

I remember the days of Oedipus, where everyone was transported in time with everything from props to make up to an awesome cast and chorus. That was a freaking awesomely enjoyable time. :D I thought got part 2...?

I remember the many trips / outings we all made. somehow mid valley seems the most often, followed by sunway pyramid and the others. The super indecisiveness of the people and the many steps extra we walked for that reason :D

I remember those days that even in semester 1 these particular people's butts were plastered to the blue library seats from after lecture to late evening, getting up only to eat lunch. And its definitely NOT m108 hahaha.

I remember being very proud of them for various reasons. more than getting champion, they stuck together (and still do) and did everything with a team spirit. And we had our first IMSS being a GIRL that totally rewrote history! I still believe her to be one of the best until now :D

I remember dancing to jai ho and forgetting the steps onstage despite practicing like crazy the whole day. Told'ya I couldnt dance lol.

I remember going for treasure hunt for the first time and looking like crap later :P but I did not look worst than my juniors tho, thankfully XD

There are so so many things I remember. This is some of them. Of course, how could I ever forget the days we the library furniture would mug, forgetting time and food? of purple/ red/ white spot books and mms models and more...

Thank you to each of you who made my life more meaningful. To those who saw me through various stages of my life. To those who teman-ed me and coaxed me to eat properly. To those who went out of their way for many many things, including the many days playing with the combination that worked on my face (makeup for ball) to taking me to the saloon; and those who sat by me day by day in lecture, the countless (literally) times prodding me(without success most times) while I took a trip to lalaland.

As you can see, I've got alot of thoughts I need to sort out in my brain. More later, and perhaps , when my brain is not so zombied (3 hours sleep the day before after being up nearly 24 hrs) and when more coherant flow presents itself :)

Myriad of feelings

2010-05-17T21:09:00.000+08:00

Myriad of feelings

I felt the need to blog, despite knowing my feelings are more than mixed, carrying both happiness and at the same time, great sadness.

It's the last lecture (of IMU BJ) tomorrow. Another end to a phase -halfway through university. The thing is...half my close friends whom I treasure and love will be leaving across oceans and seas. The many good times and random moments with the people whom I have the honour and privilege to know and call friends, walking through many many highs and lows...I know this isn't the end, or so we say. But experience has thought me to be less hopeful, more realistic.

But the good times we all shared will definitely stay in my heart and mind - the happy times, emo times, lame joke times, makaning...

To be continued

May is a sad month :(

2010-05-16T14:01:00.002+08:00

I finally decided at 4pm to go for Ee Wei's birthday party at night. The party was ok, except that being sem 5 students , exams like the upcoming summatives were looming at the back of our minds. Got to see the various new talents, like Morgan playing the piano and Ee Wei too by ear!

On another note, saw this off a friend's fb page. Its REALLY REALLY HILARIOUS. ah, the innocence of a child...can both make you smile and make you want to clench your teeth or pull you hair out in frustration... :O :)

Summatives countdown: 4 days with Mock osce the day before! :s

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The unspeakable

2010-05-16T13:13:00.005+08:00

9-10

2010-05-14T07:00:00.000+08:00

The most difficult lecture of all in the whole of my life. Stomach was flipping over and over with distaste and slight nausea, the cortex was at its wits end keeping the limbic system in control.

The first sentence after the first section was like a dagger thrust into my heart...momentarily, my heart skipped a beat.

And that just went on practically the whole day...The mind couldn't help replaying over and over the words that pierced the heart...

Musings

2010-05-13T07:03:00.000+08:00

*whistles*

its nearly the end of sem 5, and yet heavy lectures are dominating the day, along with multiple csu practices and of course, ~~not-so-productive~~ studying. I really feel like I remember nothing :/ which is REALLY REALLY B-A-DDDD D:

I wrote something yesterday that I momentarily felt "bangga".... :P and it goes like this:

"Don't let what you can't do affect what you CAN do" -

in relations to things we can/ cannot control. oh, now its copyrighted...by me :)

...7 days to summatives :s

Flavours

2010-05-05T01:34:00.000+08:00

I feel like blogging.

I felt like blogging all day.

Sitting in the library with the packets of Limau Ais and later Teh-O-Ais-Limau which is most satisfying...cold and sweet .

It was a random day, with the many flavours of life kicking in.

Various flavours brought about by friendship. The way it spices up one's life. The way the sweetness kicks in and gives one hyperglycaemia - you don't even need chocolate! The indescribable feeling after talking to a trusted friend bout an assortment of topics that leaves you just feeling blessed that you have friends,and those who care for that matter. Many, many of them who just add flavour in my life just like salt does - you can't do without it in your dishes!

Happy (belated) 22th Angeline :) Go Coffee girl :)

Sem 5 doesn't mean you forget your friends. On the contrary, you celebrate them...with the most random stuff such as coffee. Well...what to do if coffee defines you? :P

The 2 gems in my life :)

Whoots to the one on my left and right. Both beautiful ladies in their own accord, with their beauty radiating from inside to out. Its no wonder its so warm even in freezing cold IMU. ;)

Fifi!!! :) :) :) Young, hawt, smart...and single ;)

I sure gonna hear complains bout this. Can feel it coming already...

This is one heck of a power woman in my life as well. President of 2 clubs, go ask her :) recently was also promoted in a real IMU club. Whoots I tell u! :) Proud of her. And each and every one of my friends for their little achievements :)

Somehow I feel incapable of pouring out my heartfelt emotions today...

Finally Updated

2010-05-03T21:55:00.004+08:00

Warning: long post ahead. Not worth wasting time over.

Have been meaning to blog for some time now, but as I can see from the co13ra blog, my last update was more than 2 weeks ago.

Am at the “I’m not sure what to write” stage. I mean yeah, there are things I wanna blog about, but I’m not sure how I could ever write it out, express it in a way I want it to.

Lets start with something light then. I got a haircut. Which is nothing out of the norm, except that this time, everyone noticed (compared to the every time last few years). =.= reason being my fringe is short this time…Really short. Got various comments, from ok…to nice / modern to punk /rockstar and the most “cute” one…like little girl. Hahaha. Not sure how I’m supposed to react to this one. :P

MSK has officially been not very kind to me. I’m still bout 9 or so notes away from the completion of the system. The same goes for GI and Renal system. Talk bout discipline. Time REALLY flies when one is REALLY reading notes. Oh, it flies just as fast when I chill/ facebook/ daydream. Lolz

Library was relatively quiet today. Not so empty, but quieter. The library sound machine took a break I guess? Haha. Fell asleep on the muscles notes by SMM. Dislike. Thought I’ll be fine after that, but who knows I still fell asleep in front of the Dean during pbl (He’s the faci). Geez. Talk bout my body NOT being cooperative. Thank God I wasn’t embarrassed / he din’t make it embarrassing for me. For that I am thankful. Even lecture this morning despite it being one hour I still zoned out and went fishing =.=

Many people have noticed that I was not my usual self for the past I’m not sure how long. I know I held it in a lot. Many issues and thoughts on my mind, ranging from studies and more were just playing back in my mind like an mp3 set on repeat on. At first I din’t try to hide it, but then last week I decided that I’m gonna smile irregardless. Which apparently didn’t work as I’m an open book. My mother always tells me I’m super transparent in the sense I can’t mask my true feelings inside. What to do? I’m always true to myself. Although I wish I were a better actor :/

I’m not sure if I can bring myself to speak of some of the issues badgering me. But it actually took a part of me, so to speak. Not just once, not just twice, but thrice if I’m not mistaken did it even manifest in my dreams, for me to wake up and realize that it was but a dream. Apparently people usually don’t remember dreams unless its vivid or it means something to the person…I can remember mine.

Despite it being a decision I made knowing full well the aftermath, I still struggled. And I still do struggle deep inside. The many times I swallowed it in, consoled myself… the many times I told myself that the decision can’t be undone and is for the sake of not merely myself, but for a reason. The fact that it will affect others as well, and that’s the least I can do to not be selfish.

There are also certain soft spots, as I call it. Some were receptive enough to pick it up, and ingeniously “provoked” me into speaking it out. Albeit the scene wasn’t pretty, it was marred with much… I shall not continue to elaborate.

People have always been one of the biggest motivations I live for. Despite the fact that it is true the world has many types of people, and I daresay more superficial people than not who judge you by first impression…but I have always made it a point for me to try my best to not be that. To not judge for it is not my position to do so, but merely to love the person(s), and let that person know him or her holds a special place in this world and in the people’s hearts around him or her. For that reason I’ve always involved myself in activities that would allow me to know more people that I may touch their lives…knowing that on the way it somewhat destroys myself as the unbearable thought of parting never leaves my mind.

For that reason I’ve been wondering sometimes if I made the right choice. To know some awesome people knowing that I’ll end up being part of them but having to part later on. But for me, it was never a wrong choice. It was always a matter of how I would deal with it, that’s all. Some people always say why bother? You know you’re gonna have to leave, its all temporary. Perhaps, I say, perhaps. I know I may not be significant, but with that little bit that I am, I truly hope I made a little bit of a difference, by getting to know them, but joining in because the best way to love someone is to participate and be yourself + bring whatever one has to the table. Not that I want much…I just want them all to know that they will always have each other (and me, who will always be there, just not physically like before)…and that the friends who care for you and is a friend indeed is worth keeping and fighting for.

How much do you mean to me? I’ll answer this way - I would be honoured to lay down my life for each and every one of you. That’s how much you mean to me.

I’ll always be reminiscing the many (and countless) good times – the times messing around at the piano, just talking “nonsense” with each other, sharing our good / bad moments, sharing each other’s joy/ sorrow. Viva. Makan times. Walking along the escalator or in the lifts. Arguing whose the best _______(insert own argument here). Planning for the most random things such as ball make up etc. The calling of names that makes no sense. (Seriously…mangkuk? :O ) ; The joanne-athon times that had the sun shining down unmercifully on us. Tie days. Yelling out our cheer(s) like nobody else is present there. Singing on the bus / in the car with out out-of-tune voices. The many many pointless messages. The celebration of each others birthdays. And the list will only grow longer. :)

I’m not sure I can ever be fully prepared. Its just like entering into a new semester each time – you anticipate, you think you know what to expect…but you never fully comprehend it until you’re really properly there. I saw something that a good friend of mine, Dip posted on his facebook status last night – “Everybody’s afraid. The one who says otherwise is either a liar, or dead.” And frankly, though like many, I’ll never say it out loud – yes I am afraid. For I do not see what the future holds in front of me. I can’t see past the week; I can’t see past the night even. But its gonna be faith that leads me to trudge on. And love, because perfect love casts out fear. I’m just gonna take what I have, and whom I am, and walk straight ahead. And remember that there’re always gonna be another mountain, but I’m always gonna wanna make it move. And the fact that I’m never alone. Never ever. Irregardless of what I feel or think.

…The pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is still there. Fingers crossed. :/

Yeah, you thought right, this post took me an hour. And I hope none of you made it this far (I know people’s dislike towards long texts, which I’m hoping to catalyze upon to not read this post :D ). Random stuff: Nervous system module has 38 notes. I’m only done with what, 1 ? I havn’t ran for 2 weeks now. I’m wondering if I should. I borrowed 3 books from the library, in hope that it will aid me in my understanding of nervous system. We shall see. I lost my comb. Again :/ the thing I lose the most is my comb. How many combs I buy in a year all go missing. Its just that force that seems to want us apart…like how water is not soluble in lipid and vice versa :/ which isn’t aided by the fact that I prefer using my own comb over others, anytime.

On a colourful note, I (apparently) was the first non-indian (in IMU) to help out with the kolam decoration for the ICS Chithirai Puthandu(Tamil new year) and Vaisakhi Celebration. It was a colourfully-messy business, with my hands to my fingernails soiled with orange and red buncho colour ~~*runs around in glee chasing mangkuk*~~ Haha but yeah. Sobana is a fantastic designer. Oh, and Shane helped out too! Like I like to put it - I'm colour blind :) So I yeah. Ironic huh :P
But it was definitely a fun experience. Given my love for colours and arts and crafts :D

A whole load of jumbled up stuff

2010-04-14T23:49:00.000+08:00

A whole load of jumbled up stuff

Am feeling so dead tired at the moment. Nervous system is seriously sucking the life outa me. Not that I don't find it interesting...I do. but the lectures are all so so dense. On top of that, I'm 5 weeks to summatives and I'm not even touching MSK. Still got +- 8 notes in GI and renal just started off very slowly. I 'm NOT thrilled.

Today I officially was relieved of my duties from Hydra House as its first secretary along with another super responsible and enthusiastic friend, Sook Yee. I'm glad that both of us managed to carry out our jobs well (I hope , at least). It was quite a bit of work initially, admittedly. And during the house cup, I had darts to worry about, and it took up a HUGE chunk of my time. I highly doubt I'll be doing it if I were in semester 5. I wish the new committee nothing but the best. But from the looks of it, it should be a good team and a good year ahead for Hydra.

Hospital visit yesterday was...ok I guess. We met a patient with A HOST of problems. Its like whatever we ask he'll have positive "signs" (this pain that pain). but he was 81 years old, and an active sportsmen. When we asked him to bend down and touch his toes (as part of the Physical examination of the spine) , he said "1, 2, 3,4, 5, 6 you all challenge me? " in a joking tone...and bent down ALL THE WAY to touch the ground with ease. LEGS STRAIGHT. we were stunned. Later on when we tried ourselves we were not able to do it, and on top of that, was complaining of pain :P shame on us young people?

At the same time, it was the 2nd time this semester going for hospital visit and having to stand for long hours. I really don't know how I'm to survive clinical school, especially the long hours standing and the early hours waking and late hours sleeping. Beats me. I often wonder how people do it...

And time and again I'm reminded by various things on how little time I have left in IMU BJ. Random friends status updates; the relieving of duties from the house; seeing my semester 1 juniors starting to study and semester 2 and 3 juniors studying hard...Many many things just trigger this thought and I can't help but sink into a basin of pensiveness. At least for a while. How have I done? Have I made a fool of myself? Have I hurt more other's feelings more than I have made another happy?

No one is indispensable, that I know. I don't expect people to remember me once I've left, but if there's one thing I hope I did, I hope I made someone feel that they are loved, no strings attached. I hope I did something that cheered up someone's day. I hope I was never stingy with hugs or time for any other friend. I hope I gave them reason to see why they are beautiful , special ,and one of a kind.

I am falling asleep. As usual , I sleep way before I want to. Today was not so productive. Tomorrow got pbl (research not done yet), and going for a run. That I'm looking forward to somehow.

It pains me to see you this way

2010-04-13T22:16:00.001+08:00

It pains me to see you this way

...It does. Because I understand. Somehow I do understand beneath the iron-face mask (albeit now with a dent), is a person wanting love and care just like the rest of the people on the streets. But for the promises we make...And I for one am a person who keeps her promises, so I understand the magnitude of the burden you're carrying.

But you're never alone. There are us who will always wait for you, with our arms wide; lame jokes ready, "pot of gold" waiting. :)

Hugs :)

2010-04-05T22:59:00.002+08:00

Hugs :)

I had wanted to blog for a few days already, but somehow din't manage to get down to it. Procrastination, report, notes, surfing the net...you get the hang of it :/

Tomorrow going running again. 4km. at least 6 people are running. Since I din't run last week, I hope I din't "lost steam" and stop running...Hahaha.

Was really really stressed out last week. Report took up a week by itself (to realize later it was worth only 1%...not worth it! >< ) ; studies were sidelined, there was much to do, nothing was settled...

Even now there is still some stuff to be settled. Of course, prom stuff (Prom coming up this Saturday)...and Official House Meeting to be done next week, and of course top on the list is studies... I think I'm missing out something tho :/

On a "cute" note, Co13ra gurls had its "tie day". Although my tie not that obvious :P

Who said only men can wear ties and look nice in it? :D

Chui ling (master planner), SiewSee (Big mama), Shin yi (love expert), Fida (super hot beautiful :P), Yeeling (yeeling+ jit tong = yee thong)

Today, Fida, SiewSee and I went shopping for my prom shoes. What would I do without those 2 girls. :'). You guys make me feel so... I dunno la :P I wouldn't care so much bout prom if not for you girls ;) And I really appreciate it =)

Fida :) She was trying to hide from the picture :P Not so simple la my dear

Big Mama! Tom yam soup. Cilli padi. ssssssssss JINN HOT! (in jit tong's words. :P)

This was my BBQ bucket chicken rice. It was pretty ok =) (then again, IMU food sucks. So this is like way way WAY better)

Up close. It came with ice lemon tea + 2 thin slices of watermelon too

CILLI PEDAS!!! Hahaha, I was amazed at the way SiewSee could still keep a straight face and talk and all when she terkena cili padi. SALUTE! :)

It was overall a fun trip. But I wish we din't have time constraints...then I could have let loose much more. But I really appreciated their company. Most importantly...I FOUND MY SHOES!!! hahaha :) :) :)

_________________________________________

Now, you might ask me why I entitled this post as hugs. Or maybe u won't :P

I remember during super viva, one of the questions posed were if you only had a day left on earth , what would you do? I replied that I wanna meet all the people that I sayang, from in the country and afar, and give them a big hug and tell them how much they meant to me and how much they have made the world a better place just by being in it.

And before I leave the library everyday(nearly everyday), I try to give the people around me hugs :) Nothing big /expensive. Just a lil something to tell them I love them and care for them, and that they mean the world to me.

These days, they(some of them) see me and go: "free hugs". hahaha. They'll come up to me and give me a hug when they see me (or even when they leave or I move to leave). And the last week, when I least felt like hugging people, I think its one of the things that kept me sane in the chaos - the hugs they freely offered. And I don't know why =)

ps: I don't even know if anyone reads this place anymore :( make some noise yo - leave a comment or something.

And another day...

2010-03-27T22:43:00.000+08:00

And another day...

Sooky's post makes me oh-so-emo. Its the stuff I used to think bout. And still do.

And every living moment just reminds me of that even more. Having to take my convo mag profile photo (I miss the old chinadoll-fairskin joanne. dang u oh-mighty-sun :( )

I dislike transitions/ changes that involves leaving. Leaving of the people close to me, and leaving the people I love :'(

I will not go on. Why put so much emphasis of something thats gonna come anyway? I shall savour every moment now. And try my best not to go emo.

On another note, "broke" into my new running shoes again. Ran 3 rounds nonstop, walked 1 round then another 3 nonstop. Not sure whats the distance tho, BK3 park the jogging track has no distance written to it. Somehow tho it seems as if I din't run - din't perspire like crazy (shirt was nearly dry), no muscle cramp/aches, dont feel more tired than I usually am.

...I must have ran in my dream.

Afterthoughts

2010-03-24T01:56:00.000+08:00

Afterthoughts

I need a new pair of running shoes, now that my current pair gave way.

"Great" timing I would say, (3rd run only!!) but it was bought back in 2004. So it has been pretty long...

And I finally found something just as stress relieving as playing the black and white keys. Albeit one that gives you muscle cramps later :P All part and parcel of running...

2k nonstop yesterday! Geez, this "record" is gonna be hard to maintain...on the road somemore?! :O

haha. but the pressing question is...

...How to get shoes by next Tuesday?! I wanna go run again! :O

Super Viva + Charity Home Visit

2010-03-20T21:58:00.002+08:00

Super Viva + Charity Home Visit

Saturday marked the final event for orientation MEDTCH110 - Charity home visit. And as usual, the whole gang (well, minus a few) of the sexy Co13ra's attended.

But wait...viva? :O haha. Super viva was conducted in the morning...and they viva-ed...me! haha. it was a long 1hr (I think) thing. Where the questions ranged from food I dislike to why I run and if I'm an organ donor etc etc etc.

At first I thought I got off pretty easy. Sure, there were some "tough" ones, but really, not as tough or emotional as I expected. There were many areas the questions din't explore. But then again, 1 hr cant do too much questioning no? :P Also because it was Saturday... most were in a chillax mood, some wasted, some just bored, some just shy :P and the location -lt2 doesnt seem like the most conducive place, lost of distractions.

But then as I reflected at night, I realized that what they have asked were actually a lot of "intelligent" questions. Things that I would wanna change, how I wanna be remembered after I die etc... And that my history, the parts of me which I protected so fiercely (with much that din't surface during the viva) din't matter. What actually matters is who I am now, and what I will be / am going to do / how I treat the people around me. Sure, if you ask me the right questions I would share with you...but you can do that on a one to one basis, any day ;)

And the minute things asked like my favourite food/ food I dislike and my favourite colour reminded me - that in life we have to always view both the big picture but never forget the small details. Its the balance that we try to achieve in life that keeps us "balanced", not forgetting either the huge picture of the small things.

Ok, some pictures from the day.

Magic fingers.

Don't know why, after the goodie bags were packed Alex was sitting at the grand piano. We just started playing songs like "tong hua" and progressed to bella's lulluby and many other songs like 21 guns. My piano skills super rusty. And hahaha 4 hands together playing a piano. I wish I were that good :P

Come to the dark side, we have cookies

Then we boarded the bus. This is lovely Fida, who is my comrade of the dark side :P She better study or else she will get kicked to the bright light! :D

Say Cheese! =)

And majority of the pictures you see in this post are courtesy of Crystal and her super geng camera. Tal is someone whom is both beautiful on the inside and out. Perhaps her inner beauty radiated outwards and further enhanced her naturally already beautiful self ;)

Melanie.

We reached our destination soon after. On the bus playing random games (some said its actually a drinking game haha). Loved the company, it was a fun journey. The home we went to was called KL KRASH PAD located in the heart of the city centre. This picture was taken on the reception area of the ground floor. You can see the immense talent the teenagers there have.

Group of 5 =D

We we assigned 1 or 2 to a kid, and got to know each other. (Picture of my "kid" coming up). My original impression was that the kids were super shy (well some of them). But if you open up yr heart to them, they will respond with the same enthusiasm, perhaps even more.

The group gets bigger! :O

And these kids actually were genuinely happy to have people come to visit them and play with them. They were actually very VERY enthusiastic, hyperactive with A LOT of energy. It was really fun and memorable spending that short 2-3 hours with them. It was also their levels of energy that drove us on...if we had a 1 or 2 more hours with them it would have been great.

Nearly the whole gang. It happens all the time when we take photos :P

Needless to say, I was super proud of each and every one of the Co13ra's for their participation and effort. Super duper proud since day 1 ! :)

Doctor wannabe too! :)

More bout my "kid". His name is Faizal, and he's...13 years old! (doesnt seem 13 right). He was asking me bout my name , age (he said I looked 18! bangga hahaha), hobbies...and asked what I was studying / wanna be. Henceforth the talk became serious when he found out I was studying to be a doctor. "Eh, saya pun!" (me too!) then he talked about his desire to learn mandarin, asking if english was important in uni, what my pmr/spm grades were... !!!

Constipated...PIKACHU!!!

hahaha. This picture is classic. with the jumping pika-aLex This was actually a reenact-ion of the games we played, namely charades. Then there was the bomb game where everyone chose a name of a food...strawberries (ROCK! :] ), coconut, banana's, marshmallows, papaya and rambutan. Hahaha.

Bundle of energy they are :)

In the activity centre.The "Kids". A bunch of vibrant, bubbly teenagers whom challenged me to see beyond the word "charity"

The "mommies/ daddies"

Those who were equally amazed by the kid's level of energy as I was. I believe it was an amazing experience for all of us.

Group photo! :)

It was definitely not easy to keep a 15 kids + 24 seniors situation under control + make sure none is left out. but I'm proud that Co13ra's managed to do it. Nothing is impossible when a team works together, right! :)

On the bus

And I forgot to mention, on the way back in the bus...everyone started karaoke-ing! Mostly mandarin songs from AGES ago...It was SUPER super fun. Next time print out the lyrics and distribute (coz sometimes we know the song not the lyrics) Co13ra's, you guys know what to plan next! go Karaoke-ing together people! :)

Picture of the day. =)

I heart this group photo - its so bright + cheerful + energetic! Co13ra's may not have gotten 1st in the orientation. We may not have gotten a hamper. But we have gained much, much more than that. We've gained friends who will walk each other through the rest of medical school , and I believe even way after that... We've shared our joy, sweat, embarrassment, tears, birthdays etc... We've got each other as a family, someone you know will always share your tears and joy and burdens. And one another to cheer you up when you're down; humour you when you're gloomy; cheer you on when you feel like giving in; and just be there for each other when one just needs company. More than the numbers ,I believe that we are bonded together in the heart :) And if you ask me thats what matters the most. Friendship. Family. Love.

Run 2 - Say no to Tasers :/

2010-03-16T20:47:00.003+08:00

Run 2 - Say no to Tasers :/

Co13ra's u guys ffk me! lol... left me to run 4 k...again. :O

Today's run was definitely more challenging than the last. Both physically but more mentally. Was running with 101 thoughts running through my head. Control breathing, land on toes first(still gotta work on it) , are we there yet (at the end)...etc

There are some things I will never be able to properly express or let people know. Especially the things deep deep down in my heart. Involving many issues that I can never keep a straight and composed face with when I speak of it. Some stuff that only few know.

But I shall stop there. I promise myself that I shall try harder next time. Today was not too bad, although admittedly I could still have pushed myself a little more and not stop every few steps. But it would definitely help if my abdomen gave me less pain :/

My mind is thinking back of the run in the face of the sun (There goes my goal of staying out of the sun :/), the times I reach a bend (or slopes!!), doing all the warm up exercises (which actually hurt ok!!!) with one funny one named "Superman" (and getting teased by JJ!!!) and more...but funnily,I gotta say like I said to Sandip today - that I actually enjoy running. Its...funny actually.

On another note, it seems like I got a goal / target - to finish 10k nonstop by end of sem 5/before the pms batch leaves Malaysia. Shall see whether its actually achievable...it still remains to be seen.

And...I'm actually considering opening a "runs" label. Since its my second post. And I actually forsee more to come. haha. So welcome to the "Runs" post :)

And as for the slightly sore leg muscles and the sweat and the tough exercises...I would do it all over again. Chui Ling (I know you're not reading this) you're supposed to join me next Tuesday right!

March Blues

2010-03-12T21:00:00.008+08:00

March Blues

Feeling super duper tired after 1 week of MSK (Muscoskeletal system). still got not much time left to EOS 5. Would be lying if I said I'm not stressed, especially after the semester 5 briefing today on the "grand finale".

Really got tons to do...from the wayyy overdue gp posting report to reading notes and doing comm med portfolio... God, not by my strength but by Yours

Anyway, here are some pictures of my current life / thoughts.

Meet the head of Hamlet...minus the mandible

Been doing MMS (medical museum session nearly everyday after class. Actually really glad and thankful of the company of friends that I'm studying with - I actually am learning something (instead of just sesating)...although much revision still needs to be done :/

Pretty Sarah..a true gem worth more than gold and silver!! :)

HAPPY BLESSED BIRTHDAY SARAH!!! You've been an amazing sister in my life, one I really treasure and thank God for. Thank you for being someone who stayed through the years, for being an immense blessing in my life! I miss you already ...

Pretty women, on my left and right...

Went to Pyramid for a stress-free afternoon. Just the 3 of us . It was soooo stress free. From sushi to prom dress shopping to ice cream treats! I heart you both

Mafia style! I like! hahaha

Then we tried on shades! This was the mafia picture. Look at the ganstar and her peeps! DON'T mess with her...

Beach side party. Cant you already feel the wind gently breezing at the background...

Happy contended smiles...

The end of a happy afternoon. We needed 5 times to get a photo of all 3 of us in! Camwhoring skills fail...

Candid shot! Yee Ling, Crystal, Michelle, Chui Ling :D

I have no regret's OO-ing this semester, though its the last of bukit jalil. Group 13 rocks big time , I couldn't have asked for a better group. :D We have seriously all types of people. And what's amazing is that everyone gels together - the unity is astounding! :) Proud to be part of CO13RA's!

Tree. MJ. Siew See :P

Dress Code presentation. Of course, the lamest stuff can come out during this time...

Dirty smelly sweaty yucky! But that's what also bonded us...

You know, out of the 5 semesters at IMU, I never joined treasure hunt before. Hence, I joined CO13RA's for theirs. Super tiring. But fun to watch (coz I am senior not junior, so participation of juniors are the priority :] )

"I know I'm pretty...." (not me, Kyan la)

Kyan. Haha grown to know him a lil more. This guy is super serious in both studies, running but plays hard when he's at it. Salute.

Variety Night. We got Sinbati(female version of Sinbad), King Arthur Hokkien version, Dim Sum Crew, and more...

Once a CO13RA, always sting. (Jit Tong, March 2010). Forgive the incorrect citing format. I will always treasure and miss you guys. Even when I'm gone and you don't remember me anymore. Thank you for making this part of the journey a beautifully amazing one. You guys have made my life more beautiful by being part of it. :)